Oh god! I hate my life

The talk not the talk but the talk(III)

I went home with the worst mood ever.

After I got out of school, my car thought it will be funny to have its tire punctured. So I had to drag it ( not literally drag, I called the towing company) to car repair and walk back home.

I enter inside the home sulking thinking mom will ask me what happened and get me a large cup of got chocolate.

"Honey, why are you late?"Dad asked who was watching the tv.

A sound of something falling came from kitchen and mom came from there before I could answer.

"Where were you till now? I told you not to go anywhere without telling us? Just tell me you were with Chloe but not in some alley or underground fight club because that's really dangerous, girl. We don't want you in danger. We want no one in danger. We want peace, we love pe-"

"Woah, woah wait a sec there mom, you are ranting and what is this really about? It's just 6 o'clock."

And where did that alley and underground fight club came from. Now will they even ask me if I am doing drugs.

I turned towards dad who was looking at mom like they were trying to talk to each other's through eyes.

Then I got an idea,"I am pregnant." I said quickly.

"What?" Both mom and dad yelled and me.

R.I.P. My ears.

Due to shock, dad stood up couch and mom sat down on the floor,

Oh my god, I couldn't control myself so I started laughing," I'm kidding guys."

Both of them sighed and looked relieved.

Mom went and sat beside dad and started playing with her hand, dad too looked uneasy, nervous may be.

Dad looked at mom who nodded at him and said," Baby girl, can you sit. We need to talk."

Talk? What talk?
OMG, please don't tell me that bi**h called from school. I had to listen to the women talk about it for 2 long hours and now I'm not going to have the same 'talk' with my parents which I had at the start of high school.
And it wasn't pleasant when your parents try to explain about how babies are made and all. God, please help me if I murder someone at school tomorrow.

"Umm..look mom and dad. I-I know you're angry but I don't think we need to have the talk." I said air quoting 'the talk'.

"Oh No No, its not the talk that we are talking about but the talk is another talk that we want to talk about."
Mom said and laughed nervously.

Both dad and me looked at each other' and gave mom the look.

We were just looking at each other waiting for someone to speak when someone spoke from behind me," Finally, here is the proof that I'm the only one sane in the family. What were you guys even talking about the talk not being the talk but the talk is-"

Dad asked mom if dinner is ready when Anna and I started to argue.

"You are the one who is insane not others."

"Ya right. You guys were talking about the talk, not the talk, another talk."

"Look at you right now. Who the hell uses so many talk in one sentence- without any prior meaning I must add."

"Mom was saying this Just Few minutes AGO."

I guess I'm losing the fight and Elsa never loses.
Change the topic, Elsa.

" MOM, WHY ISN'T SHE BEING PESTERED FOR BEING LATE?"

"Dinner is ready"

"What?"we both said and looked towards dad and mom who weren't in the sofa but in the dinner table, sitting calmly like we weren't arguing in the same room, already starting to eat.

Guess what was for dinner. Yep, my favorite lasagna not only mine but ours both Anna and me.

We both looked at each other and rushed towards the table our incomplete argument totally forgotten.

My dear lasagna,
Here I come to devour you.