A Black Girl Story

Chapter 6

                                               Unloved

          "It stands to reason that unloved and unwanted children

       are going to get into crime." - Andrew Young

  I flipped through the channels on the Tv, surprisingly Eli hasen't called me for any new assignments today. I been up every since that dream I had about Felix. I know I was being paranoid but I couldn't help myself. I really don't know why I am feeling like this. Maybe it was because I finally grasped on to the fact that what I was doing is wrong. I pulled the covers off of me and got out of the bed.

I decided to talk to Eli since he hasen't asked for me. I slipped some shoes on and walked out the door. Like usaul I walked down the same hallways I go through everytime to get to his office.

When I arrived a guy was standing at the room. "The boss doesn't want to be bothered today and told me to tell you that your free for the day." he said. I was confused and curious what was so important for him to be alone? I walked down the hallway but hid behind the corner. When the guy finally left from the door and went on his way I came out of my hiding spot and went up to the double doors. Will he be pissed if I came in? If he would get mad what would he do to me? Should I go in?

After about 5 minutes of debating with myself I turned the knob on the door and quietly opened it. As I stepped in I closed the door softly. Eli was faced down on his desk with his arms wrapped around his head. He really did look like he didn't want to be bothered so I was about to leave. But something in my heart told me to stay and see if he was okay.

I walked slow paced up to his desk looking down at him. I breathed then tapped his shoulder. "Eli." I said. He just stayed their ignoring me. I tapped his shoulder again.

"Go away!" He screamed. For a second I was frightened but then something came over me and I wasn't scared anymore. "What's wrong?" I asked him. He raised his head surprised to see me standing there. His eyes were blood shot red and that let me know he was crying. "What the hell are you doing here?" he spat. His words didn't faze me because I saw right through him. He stood up and walked around his desk and was right in front of me. "I said leave me alone." he said with anger in his voice.

I didn't listen instead I did something dangerious, I hugged him. For two minutes he tried to get out of my grip but soon hugged me back. Then that's when he had let everything go and cried in my arms. I would have never in a million years thought someone as big and bad as Eli would be crying right here in my arms and especially in front of me.

I had to think to be the person he is now means that something in his past had to drive him to be this person. Someone is bound to break down if they hold stuff in 24 7 trust me I know.

After about 4 more minutes I moved me and Eli to the couch so I could sit down. He laid his head on my lap as I rubbed his head. I knew he wouldn't want to talk about it at the moment. Infact he probably wouldn't talk about it at all. After all this is over he most likely would tell me to act like this had never happened.

About 20 minutes later Eli was still laying on my lap and I still wanted to know what was wrong with him. So with courage I decided to ask him. "So are you going to tell me what's got you feeling like this?" He sighed then to my surprise started telling his life story.

Eli Pov

I didn't know what the hell I was thinking. I didn't expect any of this to happen. I don't know what came over me, I never cried in front of anyone in my life except my mom, my homeboy, and my aunt. That's another story for another day. I hate crying in front of people because it shows a sign of weakness. It was something about Ziara that made me open up to her.