Dreams of Deception (BoyxBoy) [Book II]

Chapter 11

Hello there!!

I should be doing homework.... but EH!! I will update instead:) because I love you all dearly:)

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Anthony's POV

Have you ever just sat there and listened to the world? Nothing better to do, but just sit and listen.

Listen to the leaves blowing in the trees. Listen to the secret conversation that they are having. A whisper here, a promise there. 

Listen to rain drops land on the ground. Feel them cascade down you cheek. Someone asks if you are crying, and you respond, 'No.. Not yet.'

Feel the breeze roll over your skin, through your hair. Listen to it whisper in your ear, promises of a tomorrow that will never come.

I guess you could say that I was focusing on every little thing around me, but completely spacing on what was in front of me. Not what, who. Conner.

"I don't think I understand what you are saying." He said, pulling me out of my reverie. Pity, I was in such a nice place.

"When you look at me Conner, what do you see?" I asked, completely changing the subject.

He was confused at first, but then sucked in a breath, and put a hand through his hair, before he answered. "Someone strong. Not physically, but mentally. I find it intriguing when your mind wonders, like it did a second ago. You look off into the distance, focusing on something, but it's like your really not looking at it, your millions of miles away. I know that I just met you, and I know that I shouldn't already know these things. But it seems like I have known you my whole life. Your face, it brings up things in me that I thought were long since dead."

I stared past him as he said all of this, fixating my eyes on a guy playing with his dog, by throwing a frisbee for him.

"I'm not right for you Conner and you know that." I said, stating the obvious.

"Why do you keep saying that?" He asked, bewildered.

"Look at you Conner. Look at me, people will think that I am your father. That is the last thing I want to happen, people talking."

"I don't care what people say! And neither should you."

"Your such a naive child." I said under my breath.

Silence filled us, as my words sank into his skin.

I took this time to look up at the clouds. Naming off each object I saw, or at least I think I saw.

I closed my eyes and pictured Andrew's face. His tan skin, deep set brown eyes, dark hair that looked dark brown in the sunlight, but seemed black in low lighting.

This way his lips formed when he was about to kiss me, or his smile when I made him really happy.

That horrible half smile that he does, and he knows how crazy it drives me, that's why he does it.

I heard Conner starting to say something, so I pulled my focus back to him. "He's handsome you know." He said, looking away.

I didn't say anything, so he continued. "I can see why you married him. I saw your face when your eyes laid on him. Do you always look at people like that? With such love and compassion? I have never seen anyone give me that look, is all I'm saying." He stared at his feet, not meeting my gaze.

I could tell how uncomfortable this was making him. I felt bad for him though. He basically just said he doesn't know what love is.

"It's great. That feeling you get when your in love. It's like they say in books, your stomach feels like there are butterflies floating around. Your head feels like its in the clouds. And your afraid that if they didn't hold onto you, you would float away. You know that when you come home everyday, they will be there waiting for you. Opening their arms without saying a word. Because they know that the world is a cruel place, and they know that you feel safe in their arms. Every thought in your head is about them. When you wake up in the morning, the first thing you think about is them. When you go to bed, same thing. Hell, you even dream about them." I paused taking in a breath. "You will find it someday Conner, just not with me."