Leaving Home

"Stan, listen to me. He actually tried to kill his brother. There's no coming back from that."

"Yeah, but he turned out nice in the end, didn't he?" Stan argued, "Heck, he even saved the constable from that really smart math dude, remember?"

"That's not the point!" Bella exclaimed, throwing up her arms.

"What're you two arguin' about?" Ma Pines asked as she set a plate of food on the table.

"Stan thinks that Ducktechive's twin brother is actually a good character," Bella explained, glaring at her boyfriend.

"And he is!" Stan repeated, "He became good and made up for it."

"Stanley, he held a grudge against Ducktechive for ten years," Bella said, "That's half of a duck's life span!"

"What does it matter, anyway?" Ma asked, and Bella and Stan turned to look at her, "It's just a silly TV show."

"Madamn, I am offended," Bella's eyes widened as she held a hand to her chest, "It is no mere TV show."

"Yeah, Ducktechive has a big mystery element, and a lot of humor that used to go right over my head!" Stan agreed. Ma laughed and shook her head.

"Well, dinner's just about ready," She said, "Where's Ford and Fiddleford?"

"I think they're upstairs doing some nerd thing," Stan answered. Gompers bleated and started chewing on the tablecloth. Stan pulled him away, "Gompers, no."

"Filbrick, would you mind getting the boys?" Ma asked.

"Alright," Filbrick said and stood up, leaving the room to go upstairs.

"So, you still don't have a very good argument as to why Ducktechive's brother is a good guy," Bella said, turning to Stan, "I mean, it's like saying that girl penguin that liked Steve is nice just because she apologized for nearly killing him."

"What? It's so not the same!" Stan argued.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!"

Bella and Stan jumped, torn from their argument and looking upstairs where the yell had come from.

"Uh, what were the nerds doing when we came down here?" Stan asked nervously.

"I... think they were gonna make out?" Bella winced.

"P-PA! It's not- we weren't-!"

"Uh-oh," Bella gulped, sharing an anxious glance with Stan. They quickly got up and ran to the bottom of the staircase just in time to see Filbrick shoving both Stanford and Fiddleford down the stairs. Fiddleford had a fresh purple hickey on his neck that matched one on Ford's neck.

"I will not have fucking queers in my house!" Filbrick snapped. Fiddleford clung fearfully  to Ford's arm as the latter stumbled backwards.

"Pa, please, w-we were just-" Ford began, only to get interrupted by his dad.

"I don't care what you were doing; get the fuck out!" Filbrick shouted. Ford and Fiddleford were roughly shoved outside, and Filbrick slammed the door in front of them. Bella flinched, fearfully hiding behind Stan.

"Filbrick- what happened?" Ma asked.

"Laying together- makin' out- like fucking gays," Filbrick growled, "Both of 'em."

"...Actually, Fidds is bisexual."

Both parents turn to look at the girl, who was standing nervously next to Stan.