Twisted

The encounter

CHAPTER TWO

Me being me, my brain didn’t tell me that I ought to drop the bags in my hand first before I tried bringing out the ironing board. No, not that, what it told me was that I should get it all so as to save myself another trip. Oh! Did I mention that am lazy? Well, if I haven’t, here I am telling you now; I am lazy.

I started struggling with the board, yanking and pulling, turning this way and that. For the brain to take a leave of one’s head is quite dangerous. I was drenched in sweat and still struggling with load when I heard;

‘Thwack!’

I froze. Is that what I think it is? I asked myself. I couldn’t be, it shouldn’t. Can’t I just humiliate myself in privacy? Now I just had to go and hit someone with the board.

I turned around slowly, afraid to have my fears confirmed. Who am I kidding? The testament of my foolishness is right there in front of me doubled over in agony. It seems in struggle with the board, the part of it which is already outside made a very painful contact with his groin. How this was possible I don’t know but that wouldn’t be a surprise considering the absence of my brain.

In a rush my brain came back and the instructions I got from it was that; drop the bags and go attend to him. In reaction to this command, the muscles of my arms dropped the heavy bags.

‘Thwack!’ came the sound of the bags dropping together on the person’s feet!

I quickly bent down as he let forth another groan.

‘Am so sorry mister, I wasn’t alerted to your presence. I am terribly sorry and I don’t know what to say. What can I do to help?’

‘I think you’ve done more than enough.’

‘Am really sorry and I feel bad for what just happened.’

‘As you should well be. I only came to offer my assistance when I saw you struggling with the board. Only to get here and was almost murdered.’

‘Actually it would be man slaughter as it was done without intent,’ I lectured him to which he rewarded me with a glare.

‘Man slaughter, murder, it just boils down to the fact that I got hit twice. Why didn’t you just drop the bags and bring out the board?’ he asked with a glare.

‘I was trying to save myself another journey and besides, I was not thinking straight due to fatigue,’ I said sheepishly.

‘You stay in this building?’ he asked.

I nodded while thinking that he probably needs assistance with directions to wherever he is headed and the least I can do is direct him.

‘Let me help you then,’ he offered.

I looked at him, bewildered. He still wants to help despite all that happened? ‘Let me just help you instead,’ I said, ‘You just give me the room number you are going to and I would tell you which floor it is.’

‘Just hand me the board he said with authority and voice like that I don’t trifle with. I immediately bent down to carry the board.

‘And by the way, I don’t need assistance because I stay here. I know the direction to my room.’

‘Your room?!’ I asked as I jerked up and hit him on the head with the board again!

‘Ouch! Woman isn’t one save with you around?’

‘Am sorry but all this weren’t my fault. I didn’t know you were around and now you just surprised me with what you said,’ I glared back at him.

‘Just hand it to me,’ he said as he tugged it from my hand.

‘Which room do you stay in?’ I asked as I lock the car’s door and pick up the bags.

‘Room 71.’

‘Wow! You on the third floor same as me then. I stay in room 65,’ I informed him though he didn’t ask for it. That is another trait about me, I talk a lot.

‘Interesting but dangerous,’ he said while giving me a sideways look.

‘What?’ I asked confusedly. What in heaven is he talking about?

‘Your being on the same floor with me.’

‘So?’

‘With you being there, lots of accidents are prone to befall us all. I pray I don’t die,’ he said with a straight face.

Getting his implications, I just cracked up with laughter. ‘You are funny,’ I said in reply to the questioning look he gave me.

‘I wasn’t aiming to be funny.’ After saying this, he stepped out of the elevator and strode briskly in the direction of my room while checking the numbers on the doors.

I followed quickly but not fast enough. Throughout our conversation, the guy didn’t even smile, but the things he say and how he says them are funny, at least to me.

When I got to him standing by my door he said, ‘Quite painful meeting you and to guard against further accidents, I would take my leave now. I think you are quite capable of taking in the board yourself from this junction.’

He turned and left, leaving me with my mouth wide open. I definitely haven’t met someone like this before. I couldn’t really get worked up over what he said because what he said was funny but also cruel. I gathered myself together and unlocked my door.

This time around my brain didn’t desert me. I think it is due to the unusual conversation I just had. I took in the bags first and then came back for the board. Setting it down, I headed to the kitchen to get myself a drink. After that type of encounter, it is no wonder one is left drained and reeling. He has the presence of a whirlwind; is around for a little while and leaves behind a great impression.