Lost

tension

The moment both of us enter the car, tension fills the air. Thoughts flood my mind and I can't help but overthink last night. What was my file really doing on his desk? Does he know I saw it? What if he can tell right now?

He notices my quietness and looks over at me, only to receive an exhale in response. I continue to stare out the window, the green blurs of trees flying past my eyes.

"What's wrong Liv?" He asks, his voice still a little scratchy due to his lack of sleep.

I exhale deeply, not wanting to tell him how I truly felt. So, I spit out the lie I always do. "Nothing, I'm fine Elliot." I say.

"I've known you long enough to know that's not true. You are my partner and you should trust me enough to tell me anything. I've got your back, and mean it in every way possible." He turns his focus back on the road, gripping the steering wheel a little less tightly.

I bite my lip, my face flushed a shade of light pink. Did he know I saw my file? Or did he just suggest he had feelings for me?

"I was watching some TV last night, and an episode of Criminal Minds was on. Reid had been looking through some files and saw JJ's. He had picked it up and started to look through it, but forgot to put it back in the file organizer. It really boggled my mind how her trustworthy partner could betray her like that and just flip through her whole life without permission?" I say, sarcasm dripping from every word that left my mouth.

His grip suddenly becomes much tighter, and his knuckles a lot whiter.

"It wasn't what it looked like Liv, trust me." He said, shortly before I cut him off.

"Wasn't what it looked like? Oh, you can't be serious." I scoff, astounded that he would even try to say something like that. "I saw my file scattered all over your desk, which looks like to me that you were looking through it." I spit out, crossing my arms as my heart raced in my chest.

"It was for-" Elliot's lips pressed together as I cut him off.

"For what? I never though the person I trusted with my life with would just flip through the pages of details containing my life story." I say, infuriated even more with every word that comes out of his mouth.

I look over, and Elliot is practically ready to explode. His knuckles a pale shade, his arms and hands tensing up and before I know it he pulls over on the side of the road.

"Why did you pull over?" I ask, my arms folded across my chest and my heart almost beating out of my chest.

"Olivia, you need to listen, and listen closely." He said, his anger practically radiating off his body, making the car even hotter inside.

"What is it Elliot? How could you possibly explain this one?" I ask, lifting my shoulders up and down, knowing damn well he did not have an explanation.

"Do you remember the Manhattan rapist we caught almost a year ago?" He asks, his deep blue eyes peering into mine.

"Yes, I do." I reply softly.

"Well, he's out now. Munch and I were filling out DD5's when one of them had a similar MO as the guy we caught last week. We checked, and he just got out two weeks ago, and is back on the move. Munch and I informed Cragen, and he told us to keep it on the down low until we knew where this guy was headed. Before we knew it, he had been spotted outside the station with a letter. A letter informing us that he would stop at nothing until he got to you. So, I had to go into your file and match the details in your file to the others he targeted in the past to get a more accurate profile of the bastard. And God knows that I will do anything and everything in my power to protect you Olivia Benson." He exhales heavily, the stress and worry evident on his face.

Silence fills the car once again, and the only sound filling my ears is the loud thumping of my heart in my chest. I had no idea that he had my file because I was the target of a past, and now present case. How could they not tell me about it? I can protect myself, and they all know that.

"I didn't realize that he was out, never mind that I matched his MO. Do we know where he is now? I want to nail this son of a bitch." I say, back to my old self and completely dismissing the whole ordeal with Elliot.

"Liv, you know I can't let you help with the case. Our number one priority is keeping you safe, the only thing you can do is try to not go anywhere by yourself. Cragen even recommended me to stay at your place until this case is resolved."

At this point I was almost fuming.

"Are you kidding me? You know I can handle myself, I don't need a babysitter to make sure I am safe. I just wish I could help with this case, I know this guy more than anyone else working the case." I say, breathing out heavy and looking at him. At his big, blue eyes.

We both are just breathing out heavily, the tension building as each second rolls by. I don't realize it, but within a second my lips are pressed against his. We fight for dominance, and he finally wins as he slips his tongue into my mouth. God, I loved this man. And I had felt the same way the first day I met him. I my head back, oxygen becoming a necessity. We just stare at each other, like two awkward teenage kids afraid to talk.

"I like you, Olivia Benson." He says, a smirk spreading across his face.

"You aren't too bad yourself Stabler." I reply, as he sticks the key in the ignition and continues to drive down the city street, my mind buzzing with thoughts about what the hell just happened.

A/N: Hey guys! Sorry I haven't updated in a while, I've been swamped with school but finally had some free time this weekend to write, and it feels so good to just write. Hope you all enjoy this update, there is quite a ride in store for the Benson and Stabler!