My Love Untold

Heading Home

I couldn't help but watch Levi with curiosity as he tore a piece of bacon in half, giving it a freakishly intense glare as he did so. I looked down at my own plate, which was almost empty, before looking at Levi's. His plate was still rather full considering his love of the food. My mind kept reliving the conversation we'd had a few moments prior, and I couldn't help but wonder if I had somehow ruined his mood.

Deciding I should test it, I reached over to his plate and slowly grabbed a piece of bacon and brought it up to my mouth. I was tempted to put it back, but he wasn't going to stop me from eating it, so I took a bite before questioning his mood.

"Are you okay?" I asked him. The intensity of his glare shifted to me once I gained his attention and I pursed my lips. He nodded shortly and raised an eyebrow.

"Of course, why wouldn't I be?" he responded, returning his attention to the bacon as he took a bite. I looked down to hide the smirk that had appeared on my face.

"Because I just stole a piece of bacon, and you didn't slap my hand away from your plate," I said, taking a small bite. He drew his lips together in a tight smile. I reached down and tossed a piece from my plate to his to replace the strip I stole and his hands fell to the table. "Plus you said you didn't sleep well last night," I added.

Levi dropped his bacon on his plate and met my eyes, his intensity fading into a calm sadness. "When I got up this morning, I had a weird feeling. Then you asked if you were going to die out there, and it didn't exactly calm my nerves. What if something happens to you, today?" I reached out to him, encasing his trembling hand in my own.

"It was a moment of weakness. Nothing is going to happen. To either of us," I said. I felt his shaking stop and I smiled at him. "Besides, you're still Captain. You can't show fear in front of everyone out there. Especially not Petra." Levi rolled his eyes playfully and I backed away, finishing off the few strips I had left before promptly jumping out of my chair.

"Where are you going?" Levi asked me, causing me to turn on my heel, once again giving a playful salute.

"You don't expect me to go outside the walls in this, do you?" I responded. I noticed him smirk before I turned around once again.

"Wait, what about the-" before he could ask for my help with the dishes, I closed the door behind me, chuckling as I returned his house key underneath a stone on his windowsill. I saw him through the window and gave him a small wave when he stuck his tongue out at me. I started down the street, small shivers running down my back at the cool breeze. I wrapped my arms around myself to preserve heat.

A few houses down, I found myself staring at the wall. Memories flooded over me as I remembered the first encounter I'd had with the Titans. That had been the reason I chose to fight the beasts. If it hadn't been for Armin, Mikasa, and Levi, I'd probably have died out there long ago. I sighed and shook my head at my meltdown during breakfast. Training had turned me into a warrior. There was no way I was going to let a simple meltdown destroy years of training and hardships.

Mikasa was already standing outside when I arrived home. I had shared a home with Mikasa for as long as I could remember, and ever since the incident, we'd gotten even closer. She stood with her arms crossed, as she watched me walk over to the porch. Her lips were pursed and I winced slightly at her angry expression.

She raised her hand and it came down on my exposed arm. I pouted slightly at the sting and looked down at the red mark that was already starting to form.

"That wasn't really necessary," I mumbled to her. She grunted.

"You were gone when we woke up. I was worried about you." I looked towards the door for a brief moment before returning my glance to her.

"Look, I'm sorry but I didn't feel like staying inside all morning. I went to go visit Levi," I said. Her expression shifted to one that almost matched pity, but she grabbed my arm and dragged me inside before I could truly identify it.

I noticed Armin immediately, his mind seemingly hard at work as he scribbled in a small leather book. I had always wanted to ask him what he wrote inside that book, but I was constantly nervous about being shut down. A while ago, I simply chalked it up to either being a journal or a book that he was writing. Either way, I wanted, more than anything, to read what was inside.

I had heard Marco before I saw him. I was caught a bit off guard seeing him in my house rather than Jean's, but I wasn't one to complain when a friend showed up. He kept asking Armin simple questions, as if trying to spark a conversation but was met with quick, one-word answers before silence would fill the room once again. I felt kind of bad for the guy.

Upon my entrance to the room, or to be more accurate, upon the sound of Mikasa kicking the door in as she led me inside, Marco stopped mid-sentence to look at us, causing Armin to glance up at the lack of sound. I chuckled slightly, ripping my arm out of Mikasa's hand, quickly plopping down into the seat next to Marco. I noticed Armin put the book away as Mikasa took a seat next to him. I saw Marco and Armin both giving me an unsure glance when they saw my outfit before turning to Mikasa.

"She isn't going to wear that outside the walls, is she?" Armin asked, ignoring the drop of my jaw upon directing his question to Mikasa instead of me. Mikasa shook her head in disappointment.

"I'm right here," I said in protest.

"I sincerely hope not. Knowing her, I don't even know if her gear is clean," she said. I scoffed.

"Of course it's clean, I'm not a slob," I reasoned. Marco shook his head, disgust evident on his face.

"Does she really not clean her gear? What about the blood?" Mikasa shrugged and I sat back in my chair, crossing my arms.

"The blood is the main reason that I do clean my gear," I mumbled. Armin and Mikasa shared a glance before looking back at me. Marco bit back a laugh when he saw my pout. "How do you guys feel about the mission today?" I asked, the irritated tone sadly evident in my monotone voice. Both Armin and Mikasa shrugged, both relatively ready, but my eyes were locked on Marco, who had gone quiet.

"I feel like something terrible is going to happen, today," he said, causing Armin to place a comforting hand on his shoulder, earning a thankful nod. "What if I don't come back?" My jaw tightened as I locked eyes with Mikasa. She was always the one that would have to calm me and Armin down back when we had first joined the military, and for a second I wished I could direct the question at her. With a short glance, however, I knew that she wouldn't let me. Marco was asking me for comfort and reassurance. I couldn't just let him down.

Reaching over, I grabbed onto both of his shoulders, looking straight into his eyes. "Marco, if you die today, I'm going to kill you." I saw Mikasa's hand meet her face in an act of disappointment at my comment, but Marco didn't seem to mind it.

"You're an idiot," Armin said, pulling his book out as he began scribbling once again. I shrugged and turned to Mikasa.

"I'm going to go get dressed," I stated. I thought for a second before adding, "into my clean gear." Marco and Mikasa laughed, bringing a confused Armin out of his daze.