And All It Took Was One Bullet

Training

The room was the same as when I had my first surgery. When Taylor had trained me in my coma. I took a deep breath and cleared my mind, I looked at the sleeping patient next to me, I focused hard. Imagined the base that I went under cover in. I imagined the recruit next to me. And the simulation began. "Hey, you with me? Just to be clear your still asleep, so whenever you feel you want to back out, just wake up." I began to say. I figured I may as well weed out the ones who change their minds. No use in wasting my time to help them. "What your seeing is my memory. Your going to go through and watch me, uncover what I uncovered, so in other words, your going to be me in this simulation." I took them through every memory I felt they needed to know. Surprisingly they did well. By the end, the original 10 volunteers ended to a final five. That happened after we got to the parts where I killed Diaz and the rest, I don't blame them. That kind of pain could happen to anyone. I think it was because they didn't want to go through that when the time came. My attention moved to one in particular. A tall man who had dark brown hair that changed into strawberry blonde side swept bangs. His eyes were a soft blue, almost like the ocean in those tropical postcards. His focus on the objective would have made Taylor look like he was taking his good old time. He caught on pretty well to what was being taught, and completed everything on time and done right. But what got me noticing him is that every so often he would look at me, in a way that made it look like he wanted my approval. Like he wanted me to praise him. I will admit he deserves it, but something else catches my attention. A feeling that makes me cringe. Maybe...he wants me to notice him because he likes me. I'm praying that I'm wrong. After what happened to me with Kane and Hendricks, I couldn't let that feeling back in quite yet. It wouldn't feel right. There was another like that, one about my height with blonde hair with a light blue-green tint to it. Same look in his eyes, but with a deep brown color. I don't know what made me popular all of a sudden but I'm not sure how to handle it. Maybe I'll get used to it. What am I saying...if I get used to it I may fall into their trap. Oh Taylor...why didn't you warn me about this? Before I new it, they were done. "Good job. Now you know the pain that comes with being on the team means, and I'm glad you accept it. These decisions will happen even if we don't think it would ever happen to us. But sometimes, for the sake of the mission, you may need to make the hardest decisions. I think your all ready for this." After that I gave them all a good bye and safe surgery. I went back into my bunk thinking about today, I felt tired after the simulation. I laid down on my bed about to fall asleep. I think I owe Taylor another special hot chocolate tonight.