seung.

BOYS

For the first time since he had been taught how to read, Adrian was frustrated. Day in, day out, awake or asleep, no matter what he was doing, the strange feeling he'd had since he met Seung followed him. He wished he could say he hated it, but he didn't. He wished he could just say he tolerated it. No, this was not mere toleration. He really, really liked this feeling.

To Adrian, love was a myth. It was like the tooth fairy; something everyone spoke of, but he had never had the privilege of experiencing. So, when he first did experience it, he was confused, to say the least. Not a bad confused, or a good confused, but still confused.

Think about it. If you had only ever heard of Santa Claus and never seen him, and then right when you stopped believing in him, he showed up in your house, you'd be confused, too. Sure, you'd probably be fine, considering he's giving you presents, but at the same time, you'd think, what the hell is this fat, old man doing in my house?

Except with Adrian, it was a feeling, not a mythical man giving you presents in the middle of the night. What the hell is this guy doing in my mind?

Seung Chai. Tenth grader at Rosemont High School. Dark hair, brown eyes, naturally rosy cheeks. Soft-spoken, doesn't like getting in trouble, or starting fights, or doing anything except being nice. Emotions, emotions, emotions. Why is he giving me emotions? I never asked for this. Why don't I hate him?

His notes- and feelings- on the boy went from neutral to super invested very quickly. Love can do odd things to someone.

Adrian wished there was a rewind button for life. He wished he could undo getting into Mrs. De Leon's English class. He wished he could undo not telling Seung to fuck off that one day he'd sat with him at lunch. But, unfortunately, life does not have a rewind button. There is no Ctrl + Z for seemingly bad decisions. Adrian could not undo falling in love. Adrian could not rewind the decisions that led to it.

Frustration. Satisfaction. Anger. Denial. Happiness. Confusion. LOVE Admiration.

Seung was unintentionally teaching him how to feel. What was once a cold, emotionless husk became an actual human being with feelings. It was too much. Adrian felt as if his brain was going to explode. He wished it would. Why Seung? Why him? Why? Why? Why?

Adrian had a newfound respect for regular people. They deal with all these problems and normal things with life, and they're constantly.. feeling, on top of that? He could barely handle one, how can he be expected to handle both?

He had expected that one day at lunch to be just that. One day.

Needless to say, it was not.

Seung continued to sit with Adrian. Whether he spoke or not, whether he was kind or snarky. And eventually, the days where he would be silent and snarky grew fewer, until they were virtually nonexistent. The two of them spoke of anything, everything, and nothing, all at the same time.

One day, a subject came up that was yet again the most cliche thing: if they liked anyone at the moment. Seung had brought it up.

"So, enough on the trivial things, I want to hear something juicy," he had said, resting his chin on the back of his hand.

"Like?" Adrian raised an eyebrow.

"Liiiike," Seung drew out the word. "Do you like anybody currently?"

Truth was, Adrian did like someone. Though, it wasn't a simple like. No, of course it couldn't have been that simple.

"It's a possibility," he shrugged.

"Oh?" Seung had grinned. "Stone cold Adri has a crush?" he teased, wiggling his eyebrows.

Adrian rolled his eyes playfully at the nickname and the teasing. "I said possibly."

"Well, then, enlighten me. Who might this possible crush be?" he went along with Adrian's obvious avoidance, leaning forward.

"My lips are sealed," Adrian made a show of pretending to lock his mouth shut and throwing away the 'key'.

Seung pouted. "Aw, come on. At least give me some hints. What's the first letter?"

He thought for a second, tapping his pencil against the table. "Y."

"Y..." Seung looked Adrian in the eyes. "Yanira?"

"Nope," Adrian held his gaze.

"Yeprem."

"Nope."

"Yael."

"Nope."

By the end of lunch, Seung had guessed every girl, guy, or other in their grade whose name started with a Y. Every time, Adrian said it wasn't, with no signs of lying whatsoever.

What Seung failed to realize, though, was that Adrian is very, very good at finding loopholes.

You.

Seung began relentlessly asking Adrian to admit his 'possible' crush. It became a daily occurrence. Adrian should have been annoyed.

Spoiler alert: he wasn't.

"Who do you liiiike," he'd shake Adrian's shoulders.

"Not telliiiiiing," Adrian would respond, every time.

One day, though, Adrian responded differently.

"Who do you liiiiike," Seung asked for the thousandth time.

"Who do /you/ like?"

Seung was caught by surprise. "Not fair, I asked first," he pouted.

"Nope, too bad," Adrian grinned(he'd found himself doing that a lot lately). "I gave you a hint, now you've gotta give me one."

Seung sighed defeatedly. "Fine," he said. "And since I'm so nice, I'll give you two hints."

Adrian doubted that he was doing this out of the kindness of his heart. Even cinnamon roll Seung had to have something behind that.

"Alright then, go ahead," he said with a shrug.

"Well, his name starts with an A..."

Adrian tried not to get his hopes up. Lots of guys have names that start with A.

"And.. Hm. He's basically stone cold."

Stone cold Adri has a crush?

Seung's words repeated at the back of Adrian's mind. He pushed them further back. That could be anybody.

"Now I get a second hint. Get thinking, Santos," Seung grinned mischievously.

Adrian sighed. He knew it.

"Well.. Hell. He's super nice. Probably too nice, but coming from me, that's not much."

Seung thought for a second. "All the Y guys in our grade are douchebags."

As the bell rang, Adrian had one thought going through his mind.

Fuck it.

"You know, when you first asked for the letter, you never said it had to be their name. What if it isn't?"

And with that, he walked off to his next class, leaving a very confused Seung still standing at their lunch table.

Neither Adrian nor Seung got any sleep that night.