Truths Of A Lie

Mama's Hope

"Ho-seok! Jung Ho-seok!"
The voice became more and more recognizable as Ho-seok regained his consciousness. There was a shadow and pretty soon it all came rushing in like a flood.

It was a sunny day in the house and Ho-seok had brought a picture to his mom.
"Eomma! Eomma! I made a picture for you!"
She took the picture and smiled.
"Ho-seok! It's so beautiful!" She said as she hung it up on the refrigerator. "This is where all the perfect art will go for the world to see." She pinched his cheeks and started to cook again.
"Ho-seok. You want to help mama cook?"
He smiled and nodded.
"Well.. Mostly everything is done.."
He pouted. "But.. There is one thing left." His eyes brightened with hope. "It's a very dangerous job and only a big boy can do it. You think you can do it without getting hurt?" He nodded excitedly. "Okay.. Watch mama very closely."
She took the knife and cut the first few slices of meat, then took his hand into hers. When he seemed to be getting it, she let go of his hand. She watched her son proudly and then went to stir the pot.
Everything seemed to be going perfectly until he started hearing the voices. "No, Mama."
"Mwo Ho-seok?"
"No Mama!"
"Ho-seok? Are you okay?"
"NO!" He screamed before bursting into tears. She rushed by his side, but that's when the blade was at her throat.
"Ho-seok.. Please.. Listen to mommy."
"You.. You hurt her.. You hurt my mommy.."
"No baby, I'm right here."
"You're not my mommy.." he cried.
"Ho-seok." She said before a thick crimson slit formed on her neck and began to seep through her lips with a smile. She touched his face before the coughing and sputtering of blood took over. The door closed and his focus stayed on the crimson covered woman. The color spilled onto the floor and tangled into her hair. It was settling into her clothes as he approached her.
His eyes began to see a reflection of himself in her eyes and his tears began to seep into her skin. Then he dropped the knife and went upstairs to his bed. I watched as the blood of the blade faded away and listened as the cries of Min Yoongi filled the house. I watched as Ho-seok slept and then, when he had awoken, he went back downstairs. There Min was, covered in blood and drinking a glass of cranberry juice.

"Where's mama?" He asked
Min looked up at Ho-seok with a red face but a serious expression.
"Min?"
"Mama is no longer here. She went out to buy some more groceries."
"When will she be back?"
"One day, she will return to us."
"When?"
"Soon." He said and turned to him.
"From now on, it's just going to be you and me."
"Until Mama comes back."
"Until Mama comes back." Min nodded. "Help me clean up."
"Okay."

Ho-seok froze. He stared even harder at his hands and then at the face of the person. He saw her. He saw his Mama.

"Mama?" He began. "Mama?" He leaned over the body and then began to cry as he touched it's face. "Mama!" He cried.
"Shhhh. Ho-seok, that's not her."
"Mama!" He cried louder as he held the corpse closer to his body. "I killed Mama!" Min paused and was about to say something when a light turned on.
"Ho-seok, we have to go now."
"I can't leave Mama!"
"Mama is out there waiting for us!"
"I killed her!" He screamed. The nurses were running towards him.
"Jump!" Min yelled and jumped out the window. The nurses grabbed Ho-seok and dragged him away from the nurse into a dark room.

Solitary confinement..

He was strapped in a strait jacket and forced to take pills everyday. Eventually, he didn't resist the nurses and they gave him his own room. Then took the strait jacket off of him.
Finally, they allowed him to be completely isolated.

He laid there peacefully, but I knew that he wasn't fully at peace with his mind. Those torturing images in his head, the thoughts coming to consume him and..

I blinked.

Am I him?

He was just like me.
I just didn't know why I was in the white palace..

Or is this it?

Am I Ho-seok?

Did I kill my own mother?

Was Min Yoongi my brother?

I kept thinking deeper about everything that had happened and what was happening until he sat up and looked at the door as if he were watching for something and nothing at the same time. I watched as with him as the second hand touched the twelve on the clock. Then, the pills came just as they had before for me.

When he took the pill, a few seconds passed and everything went black.

When I opened my eyes, the whole room was glowing with colors that I had never seen before. I didn't know how to identify them at all, but Ho-seok was far from focused on the colors. I saw how his mind was working. He was tortured by the colors because they were bright and beautiful, like his mother.

He kept seeing her smile and hearing her voice. The fact that he knew what he did made him want to die.

But he couldn't.

He refused to..

Jung Ho-seok had hope that his brother would come back for him and his mama would hold him in her arms once more after they escaped. So he didn't die.

He wouldn't die..

He couldn't die..

Even though the pain he felt devoured his soul and the agony of being alone everyday was making him crazier by the minute, he believed that eventually, everything would be okay.

Just before Jung Ho-seok fell onto his knees in exhaustion, he looked at me and smiled.

"There must be Pain before the Sunrise.." He said before collapsing onto the mattress.