To Make A Change

Chapter One

[TRIGGER WARNING:ATTEMPTED SUICIDE]

~

It was quiet. Very quiet. I stared down at my now bare wrists. I needed this. I needed to get away. I stared at my titan killing blade in my hand. I'd been allowed to keep the one that I'd carried out from the titan. Isn't it funny, how I'd gone from the girl who fought to live, to the girl who's weakly fighting suicide each wretched day? I placed the blade virtically across my right forarm and pressed down hard before dragging it. My skin ope'd, allowing blood to pool from my arms and drip onto my green Survey Corps cape. My chest heaved as I breathed heavily, leaning my head back against the wall. I stared at my locked door. Everyone outside that door was completly going about their usual lives. Good for them. I hope they live on. 

   I dragged the blade against my left forarm, cutting deep again, watching blood spill like red wine from my wrists.  I held my bleeding right arm to my chest, saluting the door and everyone behind it. I let out a sob. Suddenly, someone tried to open the door, making me jump.

    "Crow?" Levi called through, knocking harshly three times. He also kicked the door once. I didnt reply, holding my hand over my mouth to try and cover the sobs. 

 "Crow! Open the door right now!" Levi continued with a stern tone. He started banging loudly at the door. 

  "Son of a bitch!" He shouted to himself as he kicked and banged at the door. Levi rattled the door again and again. 

"Ignis! Can you here me?" he shouted. 'Ah, he's using my first name now. He must be worried' I thought weakly. ", Mike! Auro! Hurry up! Mike help me get this door down! Auro go get Erwin! Hurry!" Levi shouted. Suddenly, Mikes feet were hitting the door as well as Levi's. The doors hinges weren't going to hold up for more than another two minutes. I was getting very dizzy. My eye's continued to slip shut, but I tried to keep them open. I wanted to see Levi before I died. 

  "Stand back!" I heard Erwin order before the large bang of him jumping against the door sounded and the door flew off its hinges. Erwin and Mike stood still in shock at the sight of me. Levi pushed around them, flying to his knees in front of me. He grabbed a hold of my face with his cold hands, squeezing my cheeks slightly. 

   "Ignis, stay awake, okay? You have to stay awake!" He ordered, staring at my face. A single tear fell from my left eye. I didn't want to stay awake, I wanted to sleep and never wake up, but Levi could never understand. Hanji came bustling in and grabbed a hold of my wrists, bundling something around them. 

"...Levi..." I tried to mumble. 

   "I'm right here, stay awake, Crow, you need to, you need to for me." He replied in a much quieter tone, holding weakly onto my hand. That was the last thing I heard. I liked that. 

   ~