White or maybe Black

pain

I can no longer withstand such pain .

This kind of burning and suffocating agony can't be designed for the powerless human beings.

I would be persuaded to think it agreeable or even well deserved if it was for demons or evil power in our world ..

But demons can't feel heartbroken or depressed or shed tears no matter how much I would find it appropriate for them to suffer it all as it will surely be more painful than hell ..

Hell itself will have to feel sorry for my grey being ..

What did I do to have to endure such torture?!

It dazzles my mind how the pain still haven't managed to end me ?
That I am still able to draw breath after breath ?

That ability , I still haven't decided about , whether it pleases or exhausts me .

And although my heart and my soul are the ones condemned to suffer , my body also feels so weak and so fragile as if it's hurting for its inhabitants.

"Enough " .. a scream echoes from somewhere dark and it takes a while for my mind to realise that the dark is only inside of me .. so as the scream .

The pain however doesn't care for my screams and it continues laughing at my pleadings , engulfing me , cornering me .

The dark is so thick and it seems that my mind is starting to lose its resistance and give in to the insanity that the pain is forcing upon myself because I'm starting to hear its voice .

The dark's voice .

A long continuous scream that is merciless towards my ears as mush as it is towards the remaining peace within myself that the dark hasn't shattered ... yet .

I longed for it all to end .

I have lost count of the years that I have suffered since the first grey hair appeared on my head ..

Now my head is all grey . So as my heart ..

I know it won't end until it has turned me into ashes ..

Maybe then , In my grave , Hell will grant me some mercy .