Literal Beings

Chapter 5

My alarm clock beeps, my eyes flinging open. I rub my eyes, straining to see the time.
5:30 a.m.
I turn it off, pulling my covers off of myself.
Cold air rushed to my skin, my body temperature going from hot to cold way too fast. My pajamas were dampened with sweat, my hair clinging to my neck.
The most unsettling feeling.
I immediately took off my shirt, trying to dry myself. I clamber out of bed and flick on the lights, looking around my bedroom.
My bed took up most of my room, green and blue covers. A deep green rug covered my floor. The walls, a light shade of blue. One window, looking out at the street.
Noises, strange noises, came from outside.
My window was open, crickets chirping and owls hooting.
The most unsettling feeling.
I'd forgotten to shut it the night before, the temperature had spiked while I was sleeping.
It was muggy in my room. Felt hot and messy.
I took a quick look outside, seeing pairs of eyes staring right back at me.
I felt a horrible taste in my mouth, almost like iron.
I heard footsteps thumping outside of my room. Nathan was up.
I immediately headed to the door, opening it to the hallway. Nathan looked up at me from his phone, surprised. I flashed him a quick smile and headed into the bathroom, so ready to take a nice cold shower.
I looked in the mirror, and suddenly felt my lungs shut down.
My heart stops.
My face goes numb.
I can feel everything in my body freeze.
My eyes are black. My body- arms, shoulders, face, chest, covered with dark blue freckles. Almost like a plague, covering my skin. My eyes, rimmed with a dark purple. Black and purple and blue covered my body.
I start screaming, screaming so loud but no one can hear me. Black liquid, tasting of iron, slipped out of my mouth.
Tears were streaming down my face, quickly, as quick as the black liquid now pouring out of my screams.
I scream and scream and no one can hear me.
The bathroom is swallowing me up, the black blanket of death covering me.
I feel hands, grasping my shoulders, pulling me into the abyss.
A gun, pointed right between my eyes. A man, standing above me with the scariest grin I've ever seen. His eyes are black, rimmed with purple. His whole body was speckled blue, and I realized he looked almost exactly like me.
I feel my life, being ripped right out of me.
I fight and shake and scream and god, god, I can't- I can't breathe-
And he shoots.

"Alice- wake up, Alice! Stop-" Nathan was hovering over me, shaking me. "It was just was nightmare, Alice calm down."
I gulp in oxygen, feeling my lungs and my heart and my cells start functioning again. I gulp and choke and I'm trying to see but I can't.
My room is dim, dark shapes and I still can't see.
My eyes adjust, and I see Nathan glaring at me angrily.
"What the hell?" He muttered, narrowing his eyes at me.
"I-I-" I choke again, choking on air that I didn't have. "I was, it was," I put a hand to my head, trying to steady myself. My pajamas are once again clinging to my body, and I am so hot and I can't feel anything but heat.
"Alice, it was just a nightmare. Are you okay?" Nathan loosens his grip on my shoulders as he speaks.
I sit up in my bed, facing him. "What happened?" I look around, my window still wide open from the night before.
"You started screaming, like really bloodcurdling screams of agony. I was scared out of my mind and came in to see what was wrong." He wiped sweat off of my forehead, "What was wrong?" He whispered.
I my heart starts racing again, adrenaline pumping in my veins. "I- nothing. It was nothing, I wasn't even dreaming," I lie, biting down on my tongue to make it less obvious.
He sits back, letting out a small sigh. And then, he gave me that look. The look that knows, knows the truth.
"Okay, well," he brushed a hand through his hair, "you know where I am if you need me," 
He got up off of my bed, swiftly heading to the door.
"Wait,"
The four letters slipped out of my mouth faster than I'd intended. He turned around slowly, making me start to regret saying it, making me want to curl myself back up into my covers again. I'm not sure why I said it, maybe because the darkness and stillness of my room is saying something. A terrifying vulnerability of the dark, hoping it'll keep our secrets if we're quiet enough. In the moment, maybe, we feel brave enough to say things in the dark that we wouldn't say in the light. I bite my lip, pulling my wet hair out of my face. He walked back over to my bed, sitting down hesitantly. I can almost feel his heart thrumming, softly yet rapidly.
"What?" He asked, his eyes searching mine. In the dim light I could see the tense movement in his jaw, the glistening wet droplets in his hair from a recent shower. The sweet, peppermint smell of his clothes.
I'm not ready, I'm not ready for this. Not yet, not now. Feelings came rushing into me, images of his smile and his soft melodic voice. The sound of his violin humming in the summer wind, and the look he always used to give me. The look that had meant so much, yet had left so quickly.
And suddenly his face changes. Worries.
"Alice, I'm not so sure I should be in here,"
He knows, he already knows that I don't like him. That I don't like being anywhere near him, that I despise him. But the truth is,
I don't. Not anymore. Even when I'm not ready.
I've moved on, I'm older now. I can take the impact of everything, I can take the impact of my cousin liking me, I can take the impact of the nightmares I have, and I can take the impact of the thousands of eyes watching and listening closely to me now. I think.
He's already on his feet and I can barely make out his silhouette, shaking ever so slightly. His eyes caught mine once again, becoming familiar and foreign to me at the same time.
And he's changed too.
"But it's okay," I manage to finally say, barely a whisper. The words so small, yet felt so different. But I really need him to step away from me. I really need him to just leave me alone like he has for the past 11 months.
His eyes turn to slits in anger, his jaw clenching, "Oh so now you're okay with me? What about the past year, Alice. You've ignored me ever since that one day and it's killing me. Slowly poisoning me with every disgusted look you gave me. Do you know what the hell that's like?" He's shaking even more now, standing a few inches in front of me.
I stand up as well, looking him in the eye. And I suppose he deserves an answer, after everything I've done to him.
So I take a deep breath.
"It's not something I know how to explain," I whisper, "You told me when I was young, innocent, when I thought it was wrong. And, to be honest, it is wrong. But I'm over it, done with it, okay with it," I take another breath, staring down at my hands. I'm quiet, and he's quiet, and all is quiet.
But suddenly he laughs. Laughs a hollow, sharp kind of laugh. I flinch, a cool breeze wafting into my room from the window. I feel the sweat drip down my back, now a cold and nasty kind of sweat. Anxious, nervous, everything of that sort. His hand moves to my chin, a light and heavenly kind of touch. I meet his eyes, and suddenly feel a desperate need for him. As if I want him again, as if I miss him and the way he laughs and his dirty jokes.
For a moment I forget how to breathe, not thinking, just staring.
"I hate you," He breathes.
I am so shocked, so unprepared for that response, that I am rendered momentarily speechless.
I am at a loss for words. And oxygen, too.
And all I remember is him turning on his heel and leaving my room, slamming the door behind him.