When you don't know what to say...

Alone

As I sit here alone, in the dark, lost in my thoughts, I know one thing for sure.

He isn't thinking about me.

He wouldn't waste his time thinking about someone as insignificant as me.

He didn't care.

You were just a pass time.

I don't know how I managed to let him effect me like this. I thought I learned from the pain before. It's clear the familiar scenario is the reason why. The assumption that he felt the same and always being the first one to stupidly say it first even though you promised yourself you wouldn't.

And then the abandonment which strikes closer to home than you'd hope.

You were told you were oblivious at first and that it was obvious they were returned.

The guilt you felt when he hurt made you want to do anything. You hated seeing someone be mad because of you. You thought he'd reciprocate and that would make him happy but it just pushed him away instead. No longer willing to give you any time. Saying that it "might be for the best."

Now you're just sitting here confused. Thinking this through and feeling nothing except for the waves of disappointment in yourself.

And in the end you're just as alone as you've always been.