*ੈ✩₊˚▐ ❝ 𝑎 ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑓𝑢𝑙𝑙 𝑜𝑓 𝑓𝑙𝑜𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑠,
𝑎 𝑝𝑜𝑐𝑘𝑒𝑡 𝑓𝑢𝑙𝑙 𝑜𝑓 𝒄𝒐𝒍𝒐𝒓𝒔,
𝑎 𝑟𝑜𝑜𝑚 𝑓𝑢𝑙𝑙 𝑜𝑓 𝑝𝑒𝑜𝑝𝑙𝑒. ❞
in which we tell the story of two exes, two childhood friends, two...
For as long as I could remember, Hoshino Minoru was always perfect. She had good grades, she knew her away around things, and she knew how to charm others. I couldn't think of anyone else that could possibly compare to the beauty those honey-colored eyes possessed.
Back in our third year of middle school I was a hundred percent sure that, out of her many qualities, it was her steadiness that made me fall for her. She never shed a single tear despite having been picked on due to the envy of the girls I flirted with back in the past. She kept that smile of hers, that's used to make my knees weak, even when I lashed out on her after an exhausting day of practice. She didn't break despite hearing bad rumors about how I was probably playing around with her.
She was collected and strong, nothing threw her in disarray, unlike the pathetic person I was, who had continuously panicked about being unable to beat my rival, Ushijima, or about how my junior, Kageyama, could surpass me in the near future.
There was no one who could have rivaled her patience. And whenever the thought crossed my mind, I couldn't help but ponder as I realized how goddamn lucky I was to have dated such a person, and how utterly stupid I was to have pushed away what could have been the best thing that happened in my life.
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It was a hazy memory, the most memorable thing being how it occurred on the day after the Spring Preliminaries, when we lost against Shiratorizawa. Minoru and I were the only people left in the gym. I was running out of time and I was starting to grow impatient after another one of those vigorous practices, believing that I could have defeated Ushiwaka at this state.
It was late at night and the only thing keeping the girl from heading straight home was the growing concern that was written all over her face. I was probably the most pathetic guy anyone could have ever been with, because the next thing I knew, the pressure was building up in my head, and soon enough, I started sputtering utter nonsense.
It wasn't because she got tired of the comments she had to deal with because we were going out with each other. It wasn't because of those selfish reasons, because I've been focusing too much on volleyball and what else. It was due to pure stupidity.
What good did it do for me? For her?
Isn't she tired?
Wasn't it better before we started going out with each other?
The questions kept coming even when she asked me to repeat myself, obviously forcing on a smile, and trying to keep up her usual composure.
"H-huh?", her voice cracked, as if she still hoped that I hadn't said what I just did. As if deep inside, she wanted to believe that she was just hearing things.
God, how I wanted to believe that too.
"I said maybe it's better if we break up" I kept my calm, putting a front on and making sure that I didn't expose any pain lingering inside. At that point, I felt so numb.
"Why are you deciding on your own again?" It was the first time she ever raised her voice at me. I was used to her constant nagging having to tell me off to take a break once in awhile, but this was an entirely different side to her.
She was fighting back the tears that was ready to fall down her cheeks.
"You're annoying" I lied, keeping the composure I built. "You're always so worried but you don't know a thing about how I feel! It's frustrating to the point I practice this much, if not I'll never keep up with them!".
Liar, my mind nagged, if anyone would understand, that would definitely be her.
"Then what do you know?! Do you know how hard it is to watch you suffer while you keep hitting walls?! Why are you so hard on yourself?! You're not the only one playing, it's a team sport!". I was never good at reading her due to her constant smiles, but it was the first time she let all her thoughts out like that.
"I've been doing it for you!" she added, only for me to retort.
"I didn't ask you!"
"But it's the least I can do for someone who's pushing himself to the edge" she bit her lip, the tears finally streaming down as she stubbornly wiped them away with the back of her hand, continuing to act strong.
It broke my heart to see that the first thing that would make her cry was me.
"Fine. Whatever" she sighed, calming herself quickly, leaving the sports drink she most likely bought for me on the floor. "Do what you want. It's none of my business".
I resumed practice. But with that, the girl walked out the gymnasium, the doors however, didn't close only for another person to enter.
"Oi, dumbass".
It was Iwa-chan, oblivious to what in the world just happened while he was outside.
"What happened? I saw Hoshino running off, I think she was crying" he looked unsure, shrugging as he rubbed the back of his head, "Shouldn't you being chasing after her?".
"I ended it...". It came out as a whisper, rather than a simple statement.
"What?" He asked me to say it louder, waiting for me to say it again.
"I broke up with her, Iwa-chan"
The words still stung. It was like a freshly opened wound, like the bitter aftertaste of morning coffee, like a curse whenever I said it.
It felt like everything was going to fall apart if I ever repeated the same sentence again. The guilt was overwhelming, heck, It took a second or two for even him to believe me.
"Ha?! Do you know how good that girl is to put up with you? How can you let her go like that dumbass! She pleads me to watch over you, she's always so concerned and yet—you-you—" he could barely register what was happening, picking up a volleyball and throwing it at me, hard enough for me to regain my senses.
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"That's why!" I shouted. "That's why she's better off without me!".
"Are you stupid or what?!" He retorted, throwing another ball at me, "That's for her to decide, dumbass!".
