The struggles aren't going to last forever.. But my love for you will.. I'm not strong but I know you are.. And I know when shit goes down you always find a way to boost my mood.. These couple of days I've been.. Having thoughts and there getting worse second by second.. And when I talk to you.. It helps for a bit.. But when we argue and when u say u need to go.. I fucking die.. The way you have been acting is scaring me.. But I'm scared to bring it up to you.. Because I'm scared to see what you'll say.. Baby.. If there is something going on.. Tell me.. Please. This relationship needs honesty and loyalty.. And trust. And strength.. I've been trying my best to throw my thoughts away.. But every time I think about you... I go numb and burst into tears... I can't sleep.. I haven't in days.. Every night my pillow becomes a pool of tears. Because I over think.. I hope what I think isn't true.. Because baby.. I'd be done.. Your everything to me and I hope I'm everything for you.. I've gone through so much with u and I don't want to lose anything.. I've fought these battles to stay with u and I'll fight more.. If I can go much longer.. I'm slowly falling. I need your strength to guide me further.. I need to know you are here for and with me.. I need to kiss you once more.. I need to feel your skin.. Again.. Before its to late.. Guide to into the light.. Baby.. I need you more so now then ever.. These blades within my thighs are my only hope right now.. These tears fall so fast.. These thoughts kill me... Baby I need to know I'm urs.. And the only one you'll ever love... Am I... I want to be.. I can't control you.. But I hope you know.. I'll always love you.. I'm done.. Trying to show u how much I care.. I'm done saying words that might mean nothing.. Because these tears show it all... These cuts show it all.. This fear if losing you shows it all... This..this. Fucked up me.. Proves to you that I love you.. And we'll.. I can't go no more without you.. I'm coming for you.. I'll find a way asap.. I need to be in your arms.. I'm moving out.. I need to... I need you.. U may not need me as much.. But I can't go anymore.. I'm out of ideas.. I need to be with you.. I.. I fucking love you... Please know this... I don't care if they try and bring me back.. They can't... Paiden plz help me.. I'm..this Drowsiness and pain... This numbness.. These cuts there's so much.. Blood... I'm.. Falling... I'm... Dying.... These.... Bottles.....