The Breakup + Harry Styles

04

[the blue scarf and the elephant]

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Harry had lied about the blue scarf. When he told her he couldn't find it, he actually knew exactly where it was. He knew where he hid it, and it was still there a week later when he went searching for something to remind him of her.

The blue scarf was one of the few things left. Along with his heart, she took all of her things in his apartment when she came.

Except for the blue scarf.

He could never give that thing up. It was the one thing she always wore when they first started dating, back at the end of their high school years. She wore it on their first date and to many more dates after that one.

One would think that the scarf would be torn and worn down after so many years, but it wasn't. There was only a little tear at the end and that was it. Other than that, the scarf was perfectly fine, and it still smelled like her.

She was too cruel to take everything. Harry can only say that, but not actually mean it. It was only right for her to take the things that rightfully belonged to her, and that also meant the gifts he gave her. They were hers, and she didn't even want them anymore. She gave them all back without hesitation. Did they really mean nothing to her?

Harry went through the box of his things that she brought him. He still never took them out—in high hopes that one day, she'll come back and everything will return to the way things were and she can take back his box of things and put them back in her place.

His toothbrush and comb remained on the side of the box and everything he had given her as presents in the past sat in the center, amongst other things.

There sat the charm bracelet he gave her on their first year anniversary, with the one silver charm of an elephant. She wore it everyday after he gave it to her, and the elephant represented the day when they had went to the zoo and saw the innocent animal.

"Look at that elephant, isn't it cute?" She pointed to the large animal encaged behind the tall wall.

"Wow, that thing is really big. But it's kind of ugly, don't you think?" Harry teased, and she rolled her eyes at him.

"You are so mean! The elephant is cute!"

"Alright, alright, it is cute. But it won't be cute when it's up close to you though, they stink."

"Just like you?" She teased, scrunching her nose. He wrapped his arm around her neck and pulled her close to his cheek, and he chuckled.

"You like the way I smell."

"Yeah," She admitted, "I do." As she said this, she buried her face into his side and smelled him, a smile growing on her face. He held her closer to him as he watched the elephant walk closer to them.

"Look." Harry told her, and she pulled away a little to watch as the elephant grew near.

"Oh my god, it's so big!" She gasped.

"It is. Really really big. But it's not as big as my love for you." Harry said into her hair as he held her close again. "The elephant is a close enough size, though. Almost."

"You are so cheesy." She giggled into his neck.

"Only because I love you." He used his finger to lift her chin up, and he placed a long, lingering kiss on her lips.

Harry found himself tearing up at the memory. He could only imagine it now, the way he had held her that day. They had a great date at the zoo, and he had promised her when they left that they would come back again in the future. That promise still wasn't fulfilled, and it probably never would be.

He dug through all the other things in the box, remembering every single story behind each object. He found himself crouching beside the box the next, tears rolling down his cheeks, and his nose stuffing up from crying too hard. His heart was aching again. He tried so hard not to look in the box, but it was too hard. He couldn't stand not being with her, and the things inside the box were the closest things he had.

And the blue scarf that he held tightly in his hands as he cried into it, letting his tears wet the soft fabric. The scarf strongly smelled of her scent, and if he tried hard enough, he could imagine the scarf as her. It was like he was still holding her in his lonely arms.

-

(written 2/22/14)