Face Down

Hell Is For Children

So I know it has been forever.. but guess who's back!! Is anybody still reading this?

 - Chapter 18 - 

Love and pain become one and the same

In the eyes of a wounded child

Because hell, hell is for children

And you know that their little lives can become such a mess

Hell, hell is for children

-

I wasn't allowed to be there for Mitchie's police interview nor was she allowed to attend mine. Hers took place in the hospital since she wasn't allowed to leave yet whilst I was taken down to the precinct to offer my evidence in the case. I couldn't tell them much, only what I had walked in on but it seemed to be enough. I explained to them about how Mitchie had been acting strangely for almost a year; I described the drastic change in her demeanour and everything about her whilst they took notes and the sound of the tape recording me buzzed in my ears. My dad came with me to the interview and my mom attended Mitchie's since she was officially Mitchie's guardian and because of our age we needed consenting adults to sit in on the interviews that took place.

I can't even begin to describe how it felt to have to explain, in detail to someone that I had never met before, everything that had happened during that night and the events leading up to it. I couldn't handle the look of sincere disgust on my dad's face as I went into detail about how I had walked into Mitchie's apartment that night and found her stepdad using brute force to get what he wanted out of my girlfriend.

Of course we didn't actually mention the girlfriend situation. My parents were still unaware of our relationship so I couldn't talk about it in front of my dad and I knew that Mitchie wouldn't do that either. We had spoken about it prior to our interviews and agreed to define ourselves as friends. It was the first time that Mitchie hadn't made any kind of comment about me just telling my parents already.

When we arrived back at the hospital to be with Mitchie the curtains around her bed were still drawn so we assumed that her interview was still in operation. She had a lot more to tell than I did; she knew everything that had happened whilst I didn't.

I didn't want to think about her police interview; I wanted to be in there to hold her hand not to hear about what had happened to her. I wanted her to tell me that when she was ready and not when the police decided that it was time so in a way I was sort of glad that I wasn't allowed to be in her interview with her. As much as I wanted to be there to support her and let her know that everything would be okay, I knew that my mom would be doing that in my absence and it was probably better that way.

When her interview finally finished and we were allowed back into her room, Mitchie looked like a shell of herself. She didn't speak and she didn't move to acknowledge my presence; she just laid there and stared at the curtains. "Lex, we've got to go home, your grandma and grandpa can't watch the kids any longer. Are you two going to be okay?" I hadn't even thought about who was keeping an eye on the seven kids that my parents had left at home but honestly it was the last thing that I cared about. Mitchie was all that mattered to me, she was all that ever would and ever had mattered to me. She was everything to me and I was going to do everything in my power to fix her and make her whole again.

"We'll be fine." I replied, looking helplessly at Mitchie who still hadn't moved; she was still glaring intensely at the curtain as if she was trying to burn a hole through it with her eyes.

"Are you coming home today?" My dad asked as he flicked his gaze from Mitchie to me. I shook my head adamantly.

"I'm not leaving until Mitchie does." I had been discharged pretty much straight after I had woken up but I had little to no desire to actually leave the hospital without Mitchie by my side. She was still waiting on test results and until she had the all clear from them, she couldn't come home. My mom told us that she would come and visit later on in the evening whilst my dad watched the kids but I'm pretty sure that Mitchie either wasn't listening or just didn't hear her.

I had never seen her so numb and disconnected from her surroundings.

Regardless of her ghostly state, I climbed into the empty space next to her on the bed and slowly wrapped my arm around her waist. My chest pressed into her back and I felt her body tense and then relax as I found a comfortable position and pressed my lips to the back of her neck. "I love you, princess," I told her softly in the silence of the ward. It was the middle of the day but we had drawn her curtains again, effectively shutting the world and all of its negativity out.

She didn't turn over or respond to my words and if it hadn't have been for the way that she was breathing I would have thought that she had fallen asleep. Talking about what had happened had drained me so I couldn't even begin to imagine how she must have been feeling. As difficult as the situation was for me I had to remember that it was ultimately worse for her and it was her that needed support and help. It was her that needed to get better.

My eyes were starting to feel heavy when I heard the curtain being drawn open followed by a nurse entering the small, private space with a clipboard and a solemn look on her face. I sat up from where I was and looked to the nurse who in turn dropped her gaze to Mitchie. I couldn't figure out the look in her eye but it looked like whatever she was about to say was important so I shook Mitchie gently. She was startled but she recovered quickly when she realised that it was only me and sat up wordlessly to look at the nurse who smiled sympathetically at her.

"Hi, Mitchie, how are you feeling?" Mitchie rolled her eyes. I made a mental note not to ask her how she was feeling since she was probably sick of it.

"Sore." It was the first word that I'd heard from her since returning from the police station and as croaky as it was, it was good to hear her voice again.

"I need to ask you a few questions to confirm your test results... if you're up to answering." She explained, prompting Mitchie to sit up properly in the bed and me to do the same. "You may prefer this to be private..." The nurse trailed off, her gaze switching to me. I took the hint and made a move to climb out of Mitchie's bed but she grabbed my shoulder and squeezed it. I turned around to find a pleading look in Mitchie's eyes; I made no further move to leave.

"I want her here."

"Very well... Mitchie, we've had your test results back... Everything seems to be okay aside from one thing..." The woman was nervous, that was clear to see. Mitchie seemed calm but that could have been because she was still numb to everything that was happening; my heart was pounding in my chest. If he had damaged her permanently I wouldn't have known how to deal with it. What she said next almost made my heart explode.

"Can I ask when your last period was?" Oh, no.

Mitchie started to cry before she had even answered the question. She knew what was coming as did I.

"Oh, Jesus fucking Christ, not again... Please, not again." She whimpered and wrapped her arms around me, sobbing into my shoulder. It was irrational of us to make assumptions about what the woman was going to continue with but we both just knew.

"I'm sorry, Mitchie, but our test results have confirmed that you are around eight weeks pregnant."