Let's make a movie.

Everything that matters.

the first time i met astrid james was in first grade. she was this girl with the weirdest pigtails in the whole wide world and the best kind of laugh. she just let go when she laughed, hers was always this uncontrollable thing. like, she couldn't  herself sometimes tell why she was laughing at an ant and elephant joke. she was fucking crazy is what i first thought. not in those exact terms because i was like, what? five? i don't know. all i knew was that this girl had the best kind of laugh in the whole wide world and i some day would love to be the reason behind that laugh. then she had this weird as fuck bag. most girls used to carry barbie and princess and shit and most guys (me included) were fucking pokemon or Ben10 addicts but she, like always, in her littlest of ways that often went unnoticed by the world brought this really large bag made of cotton or something and it was embroidered, like by hand or something. it was the cutest fucking bag i'd seen and my 5 year old self was just done. i was done with having to wait around for this girl who doesn't mind sharing her food or whatever and she's always smiling like she knows something that you'd never want anyone to know and her eyes, those big freaky as hell eyes - i knew they were the eyes i'd probably want my kid to have. the whole kid thought i had like, a week ago not when i was 5 because i was a kid myself then and i didn't exactly know that the stork isn't the source of babies. anyway, so my point is, the first time i saw astrid james, i fucking knew that this crazy ass girl was a girl i would never, ever mess with. 

but the thing was, as time went by and i started becoming one of the popular kids in middle school because of my athletics and whatnot, a lot of people (girls, especially) started becoming my friends. some more than friends. this girl, she looked at me like she couldn't care less. that hit my ego so fucking hard, god, my 12 year old self was fucking devastated, man. for a while i ignored her. i decided that if she couldn't give two shits about me, why the fuck should i care? plus, jenna or jess or joe or someone whose name started with a j kissed me and i was finally welcomed to this side of the world. now, i was all dandy and fine until mrs. someone-whose-name-i-can't-remember paired us up for history project. oh my god, the look on this girl's face on finding out i was her partner shook my world. she was so....disappointed? it actually hurt. no shit. so that's when i decided that i was gonna get her to like me just as much as i liked her. i swear to fucking chocolate, i did everything i could to make that project the best project of her life and we even got an A on it but this girl, damn, she was so undisturbed (?) by me or so she acted my poor 13 year old dbag self broke to fucking pieces. 

welcome to high school/hell and we're in different classes because she took the tougher ones. i was pissed slightly. but i mean, when you start high school there's so much shit you've to deal with it is fucking crazy so for a majority of freshman year i just didn't have time only to deal with her. but she was around. in her own way. volunteering at animal shelters, joining theater club and fucking acing it all the way through, sticking up anti-bullying posters a day after she found someone in the rival school tried to commit suicide. she legit didn't ask the authorities or anyone and just imagine a freshman girl walking through the doors with this crazy messy bun on her head and a huge pile of posters on anti-bullying and without asking anyone she just starts putting them up everywhere. she was that kind of an idiot and my 14 year old self knew that he was madly in love with her and she couldn't give rat's ass about it. 
i decided that i'd finally be a man about it and say it. i'd just go to her and tell her. but right then, cianna takes entry and somehow i catch her eye or whatever and the next thing i know we're dating. that didn't hold me back from always fucking up astrid's day though. the popular i became, the lesser she cared. so i had to constantly make my presence known in her life and the only way to do that was to always pull a prank. i made sure no one got near her though. i made it very clear to the jocks that she wasn't someone they'd ever fuck with and they knew not to mess with their captain. they're good guys but i knew that me joking around with astrid would make them think that they can do so too. 

plus, astrid was chill as fuck too. she was popular in her own ways. everybody in the drama/theater club loved her. she worked office and library in her free periods so the nerds (sorry) loved her. she was always one of the very few people to actually understand games when she attended them, which was rare. she was adored by the teachers. she aced photography and she was fucking hilarious in P.E. and yeah. that's all that astrid was. goofy as hell and nerdy and funny and oh my god, she was such a goth sometimes. mostly her goth phase came out when she got anything less than an A. such a nerd, i swear. OH, HOW CAN WE EVEN FORGET HER BRIT MODE! shit, everytime she sees downton abbey she gets this weird as fuck accent and - okay we're completely off topic. 

but yeah, because astrid was chill as fuck, none of the jocks actually wanted to trouble her or anything. the only person who probably didn't like her was cianna and the truth is, cianna doesn't fucking matter in this story. 

this is the story of a jock hopelessly in love with a girl who doesn't know it. 

this story will hopefully have a happy ending because i swear my only purpose in senior year is to 

a) win her heart 

b) get something above a B- in history because the last time i gave a fuck about that subject was in middle school for that project i made with astrid. 

so yeah, folks. 

i, Reese Jacobs, am in love with Astrid James for the past 10 years or something and everyone but her knows about it. This year though, I promise, my 18 year old fucked up self's heart will not break like the past so many years. I hope to fuck she falls in love with me or we're gonna have to pack our shit and pray to God I get into the college she gets into because I legit don't know anything besides football and love for Astrid. 

No shit. 

a/n: 

super long again i guess. 

i really like typing without the whole formality of starting sentences with capital letters after full stops and since reese is the kind of person who can't give two shits about this stuff, i thought to try this.