Pretty // myg jhs

8.

They're so cute :')

Hoseok wishes he could say he's happier but he's not.

He always has this overwhelming feeling of sadness.

He should be happier because him and Yoongi are a "thing" even though they're not officially together.

But Hoseok feels as though he's fallen deeper into his depression.

He doesn't see the point in trying so hard.

He doesn't feel the point in waking up every morning just to repeat the same horrid feelings he experiences.

He loves when he sleeps because everything is blocked out unless he dreams but even then that's not reality.

Hoseok loved the peace when he slept.

He loved that he couldn't feel anything.

"Hey sunshine, how are you today?" Yoongi asks as he pecks Hoseok's cheek.

"I'm good" Hoseok lies with a big smile.

Yoongi frowns because there's something off about Hoseok's mood.

Yoongi could see the pain behind his once sparkling eyes.

"Hobi you know if there's anything on your mind you can talk to me right?"

Hoseok nods with a smile still plastered on his face.

"I know Yoongi"

Yoongi brushes off the feeling that Hoseok's lying and smiles back.

"I have to go out and the others aren't here. Would you like to come with me?" Yoongi asks hoping the boy would say yes.

"Oh no, I think I'll just stay home I'm kind of tired" Hoseok softly smiles.

"Okay then, I'll be back in about 2 hours" Yoongi smiles briefly.

Hoseok kisses his cheek making Yoongi smile.

"I'll be waiting for you to get home" Hoseok giggles.

Yoongi says goodbye as he walks out the door.

Hoseok instantly drops his happy facade and frowns slightly at the silence.

He walks into the bathroom and stares at himself in the mirror.

You're ugly and fat.

Yoongi doesn't like you.

You're so annoying.

Hoseok starts crying.

He picks up the closest thing next to him which is a bottle of pills and throws it across the room with a scream.

"I'm sick of crying! Why do I always cry!?" He yells out to no one.

He slides down on the floor and tugs at his hair in frustration.

Why can't I be normal?

Why can't I let everyone help me?

Why can't I believe their words?

Hoseok wipes the tears away and inhales a deep breath.

"I need to try harder"

"I need to get into shape"

"I need to exercise"

Hoseok says all these things out loud to himself.

You would think he was finally thinking of getting in shape a healthy way but no.

He thought that if he continued to puke after he ate but also exercised he would lose the weight quicker and gain abs.

If only he knew this wouldn't help his health.

The boy grabs his phone and searches for certain exercises he may like.

He came across something that caught his eye.

Dance.

He liked to watch cool dancing videos and he likes to dance as well so why not take classes.

He decides to call up the place and books a few days a week to get a personal dance teacher.

Hoseok felt good that he would start dance classes.

Maybe it'll help me and my figure.

an: sorry for the short shitty update x