𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐜𝐡 - 𝐤𝐬𝐲

< one

How much more do I have to wait ?
How many more nights do I have to stay up?

;Spring Day + BTS

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» park siyeon's pov

I opened my eyes, staring at the white ceiling above me. It felt like it was just yesterday when I died. The feeling of mixed emotions, sadness and anger consumed me. As much as I wanted to, I knew I would never forget my death

Being reincarnated was cool and stuff, but what sucked were the memories, they were still there.

I can still remember my screams drowned out in the laughter of the men that sat a few meters away from me. The looks on their faces as I felt myself shower in heat and flames

I shook my head, trying to stop thinking about my past for once

Blinking rapidly to try and stop tears from falling out of my eyes , I sat up in my bed and glanced at my wrist

6205

The number of days I had left...

I had been counting down the days from months now, and eventually I came up with a decision that today, I wanted to die again

Why?

Because I was getting bored living all alone in this apartment in Seoul. I had no one to talk to, nothing to do. Everyday was the same, I'd wake up, watch TV, eat something cold from my fridge and go back to sleep. I wouldn't call this living, this was waiting, waiting for my second death

I made my way to the balcony and leaned on the rails, watching people rush from one place to another. Normally, I wouldn't go outside, because touching humans would result in my death

But now, I couldn't care less. I wanted to end my boring second life

Believe if or not, I've been doing this for 3 years now, and I'm very sure I don't want to spend the next 17 doing this. I'd rather be dead. Even though the second life came with privileges like a never empty fridge and bank account, but it sucked

At first, I loved it. I went on shopping sprees almost everyday, now I wanted to shoot myself in the ass

I sighed, walking back into my room and straight to my closet. I pulled out a black trench coat and some knee high boots. That's it, I was gonna kill myself today

I then made my way out of my apartment and onto the warm streets. I wanted my second death to be at the park where I first appeared when I was reincarnated

After reaching my destination, I walked straight to the bench I first appeared on

A boy was sitting there, scribbling away on his notebook. I sat on the space next to him, sighing and trying to make myself not feel bad for what I wanted to do

I took a deep breath. ❝Hey❞ I said, smiling fully at him

He awkwardly turned to me ❝Uhm, hi?❞

❝Can I hold your hand?❞ I asked, smiling sweetly

Once the words came out, my heart started racing. Was I really gonna die now?