Chris Brown Imagines

Losin' Control (1)

Toya POV

I can't keep doing this shit no more. It hurts to be with a man who has his life tied in with his career. I love Chris I do. When we met, it was amazing. He's so Nice.

The way he hugged me and always smelled strong with love and lust. His grip around you makes you feel so safe and in love. Nothing, I wouldn't trade it for nothing in this world.

It's all the time. He's either coming home late, staying up late, busy with music, doing shows, hanging with his manager to book more shows, touring, shooting music videos, painting, working on his charity, modeling, designing clothing, and dance choreography.

See? When does he have time for me? When he does it's like 4 hours of his freedom. He spends 2-3 at the club with his friends and the other hour he's asleep.

All I do is try to join him in certain activities. If not I'm at my house on my laptop listening to music, eating, sleeping, or just laying in bed.

-
I was on my laptop looking up some cute shoes until my phone started ringing. I was hesitant to answer it but.. I couldn't not answer.

"Hello?" I said biting my lip nervously

"Baby what you doing? I miss you mama"

"Oh nothing. Same old thing.. what about you? Having a good time?"

"I love my fans but I love you more. I'm going to be gone for a while tho.."

A knot formed in my throat and it was so hard to even breathe.

"That's cool.. where to?"

"You can't come to this one like you've been coming to my other shows. It's far from home. I'm flying to Detroit later today-"

"Later today!" I asked closing my laptop.

"I know baby but it's extra money in these shows."

"Chris is it about the money or is it about us?"

"It's about-"

"Know what don't answer that. I'm fine with it. Besides, I don't care I didn't want to come anyway."

"Yaya, don't be like that. For real man I
Just wanna make sure we straight."

"Yeah we good nigga best believe that" I said. My ghetto accent was coming out and I knew Chris didn't like it.

He also know that meant I was mad and was going to be petty and difficult for a while. He's right too.

"..." he was silent for a while.

"That's all you called for? I hope you enjoy yourself. I'm going to be staying at my sisters house for the weekend."

"The whole month weekend?"

"Problem?"

"Yes. Why so....- the whole weekend?"

"You have your plans Chris, why can't I have mine."

"Your plans are not even real you just trying to get under my damn skin and it's working."

I was getting stressed l. I don't feel like arguing with this boy today.

"I refuse to stay here while you party your ass off.."

"I'm not partying baby I'm working."

"You use that excuse a lot to.."

"The fuck is that suppose to even mean?"

"Don't you got a flight to catch?"

"I'm not him Toya. I'm not these fuck niggas that's been trying you! Fuck them niggas. I love you and I mean it. Im not cheating on you. Im not ignoring you. Avoiding you, no."

"I think it's time for me to go."

"You not trusting me nor your self. Do you even care about me?"

"Don't try to flip this shit on me Chris!"

"Don't make me look bad either ."

"Don't-"

"Don't."

I wanted to fucking cut this nigga throat so bad.

"Look, I didn't call to argue or hurt you apparently again.."

"You never have time for me Chris and I hate that. I want to be able to be with you all the time."

I'm really falling for Chris but I don't think he can change. I don't think he's different... I'm trying to have trust...

"I'm trying not to fall so hard for you. I don't want that to happen and you leave me down."

"Why would you even think I would do that? You are mine and I care about you. You having these doubts man..."

"Ima go."

"I will catch you."

"This isn't a trust fall where I play with my heart like it's just a water balloon that can pop any minute.."

"I will catch you, Toya."