"My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return."
--Maya Angelou
I was currently packing my books, preparing to leave school and head home. That is, until Ms. Harper stopped me before I could escape hell.
"Ms. Aaral, is everything alright dear?"
"Pardon me?"
" I said is everything alright? I'm very worried about you."
"And why is that?" I asked, clearly confused.
"You are failing my class and all the other teachers seem to have the exact same problem. You need to get yourself together, Aaral! If you continue to fail my class and everyone elses, you'll be here next year! You might as well drop out of high school if you don't care about your grades!" Ms. Harper exclaimed.
There was a slight silence between the two ladies.
"Dont' you want to graduate?" Ms. Harper asked softly.
"I don't know what I want." And after that sentence was said, I turned around and left school.
I can't function, and im pretty sure I'm on the brink of having an anxiety attack. I mean, what if I don't graduate. My parents would probably kick me out, because they wouldn't want a child that will be the first one in the family to be a failure. As my dad stated before, and I quote, "I'd be damned to have a unsophisticated child with unapproving grades, and a disobedient spirit. That just won't do, and I won't allow it. No one in our family was dumb, nor a dropout, and your ass will not be the first."
I thought about driving to 'Palm Meadows' again, but then I remembered how horrible I spoke to Jax. So, I refused to go today.
Heading home, I drove to 'Ying & Yang' and ordered some sushi with a side of fried rice.
____________________________________________________________
As soon as I entered the house, I headed straight to my room, and flopped on my bed.
"Aaral, honey is that you?" my dad asked.
"Yes, how may I help you?"
"Sit with your old man and watch some kung fu, yeah?"
"I think I'll pass."
Was he serious? My father wasn't a horrible parent, but he sure wasn't the best. My father never really speaks to me. He comes home from work, eats, then goes to bed. There is no "Good morning" "Hey Aaral" "How are you." He does ask me how my days at school are, and as soon as I begin he quickly says "Ok, that's nice." I mean, seriously, what's your problem man? And now he wants me to sit and watch tv with him, so he can probably go on and on about crap that happened at work. I won't allow myself to be disrespected like that.
"So you'd rather do something else than spend time with your own father?"
"Basically."
"What is wrong with you, Aaral? Are you on your period? You know that's against the Japanese laws? Family should be your number one priority, Your mother and I come first!" He yelled.
"You know I barely talk, and this is one of the reasons why. I will not disrespect you in your own house, however, I just think I need a break. You should already know that I love you and mom so much, it hurts. I'd do any and everything for the both of you. But, you make me sick at the same time. You make me want to saw my ears off of my head, and cut them up into small pieces when you yell at me. You need to learn how to be more considerate of my feelings sometimes, and stop letting your pride get in the way of everything. Sometimes, I wonder, are you really my father?"
His mouth was agate and he looked furious, yet remorseful at the same time.
This is my cue to leave. Everything feels like it weighing down on me, and he isn't helping one bit.
Palm Meadows, here I come.
_________________________________________________________
I sat Indian style in the tall grass, just contemplating on my life.
No friends. No relationships with my parents. No graduating. No future.
I'm literally hitting rock bottom. Just when I think things can't get worse, there's more shit to come. It's like im falling from the top of a spiral staircase, and instead of reaching the bottom, I just continue to bash my head and body against each step. Suffering and killing myself slowly. It's not over yet.
"Hey stranger."
After I sent him that nasty, inconsidertate note, he still wanted to be in the same area as me.
This kid has a heart of gold.
Taking out my journal and pen, I wrote back.
'why?'
"Why did I decide to come back? Well, you were right. Those trifling females weren't my friends, they just liked me because they found me attractive. What's the use of hanging around people if they're going to make you feel lonely? Besides, I think I found a new friend anyway." he explained.
"Who?"
"Her name is Aaral, and the part that kills me the most is that I don't know what she looks like, or what her voice sounds like."
"I'm not sure if I can be your friend. I mean, I don't even know anything about you, besides your name. And I'm pretty sure you'll end up hurting me in the long run. Thank you, but no thank you.' I tossed the paper back.
"Then get to know me. Sometimes you have to take risks. I can't say I won't hurt you, because things happen, and that's all apart of life. You can be my friend, you just don't want to, because you're afraid of what might happen. You don't have to be my friend if you don't want to. It was a request, not a demand."
'Your request has been granted.'
//
IM BAAAACK!
what do you think the two memories will be?
boring? i knoooow. however, if the goal for my votes gets reached, you get a new chapter.
20 votes / 10 comments
