Lions And Llamas {Phan}

T H R E E

I sat down on my desk which had my paints scattered along it. I shoved it into a bag and ran to the alleyway that was abandoned. I painted on the walls. I was allowed to do it. I love coming out here.. Getting away from the bitchy orphanage owner,Adam. I got out my paints painted Phil, the boy which I loved with all my heart, as a friend..I'm straight. But the voice in my head kept telling me otherwise saying: You keep telling yourself that, Daniel James Howell.

--time skip

I admired the painting of Phil. It looked exactly like him. I turned around on my heel and walked back to my dreaded house. Rain fell heavily from the sky and I sighed but dealt with it. I hated rain because it washed away the beautiful fluorescent colors out of the sky. It was hard for me to see them anyways, Everything was slightly dimmed..Ever since the incident 5 years ago. "Dan, babe?" I heard a voice that I could memorize off the top off my head. Phil. "Hey Philadelphia" I said faking a laugh. "Hey Danasour" Phil said smiling. "I have a question, Phil.." I said, slightly embarrassed. " Sure anything, babe." The boy spoke clearly and enthusiastically. "Why do you call me babe?" I asked scared he would yell at me. I took a step back, a few actually until I hit the fence and he followed me. "Come here, Danny. Don't worry" He said and wrapped his arms around my waist pulling me towards him. "I'll never hurt you. I call you babe because I like calling people that. It's not because I like you. Why would I like a guy? That's wrong and gross." he said. Why That's wrong and gross. Those words hit me hardest and I don't know why. "Your not gay?" I said scared. " WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK? ARE YOU INSANE?? WE ALL KNOW YOU ARE A FAGGOT." he screamed along with loads more screams. I ignored the rest. All I could think was "don't cry, don't cry" I ran, faster then ever before. I ran into the orphanage, making sure Phil wasn't following me. I ran to my room, slammed and locked the door. I grabbed the bucket and blades which I hid in my cupboard.
1 cut,2 cuts,3 cuts, 4.. The blood dripped from my wrist down into the bucket. I pushed the blade down harder and it dug through my skin and I continued cutting over old cuts and creating new ones. Nobody ever knew about this and nobody will find out I hope. I roll my sleeves down and go back to the painting at the alleyway and once I reach it, I sit down and sob in front of it. I see Phil walking into the alleyway and I hide around the corner. He stops and looks at the painting and he starts choking on sobs as he realizes it was him and made by me. "Oh, Dan.. I wish you could see me now. Your probably crying right now. God knows where." He whispers. I tiptoe out of the corner and sneak behind Phil. I hug him from behind tightly. I start sobbing as he pulls me into a proper hug. I sob on his shoulder and let out all my emotions. He grabs my wrist and I yank it away from him. "W-whats wrong?" he asks and I stay silent. Worry filled my body. He knows. He lifted up my sleeve and gasped he saw the lines of red marking my skin. He started crying "This is all my fault. Im such a jerk!" He yelled and I took a step back, a few actually. "I'm sorry." He whispered taking a step back and admiring the painting and how it included all of his facial features which of I had remembered off by heart. "Danny, Louise is throwing a party tonight. Wanna come?" he asks genuinely "sure. I'll come to yours once I get ready" I said. I ran to the dreaded orphanage and got ready then went to Phil's.
--Party time skip
"Let's all play truth or dare!" Suggested the boy who was slightly drunk which I think his name was.. PJ or some shit. We all decided to join in. " I'll start. Dan, truth or dare?" PJ asked "Dare" I said smirking. "I dare you to kiss Phil on the lips for at least a minute" PJ says, a smile appears on Phil's face and he kisses me. We continue kissing until we end up out of breath. I sigh trying to catch my breath "Did you guys enjoy that?" PJ says and I nod truthfully. So does Phil "Your went for 4 minutes" PJ says and Phil looks at me "Babe, can we go outside for a few minutes?" Phil says. Everyone stares "Did he just say..Babe?"

Authors Note-
I'm a complete bitch for this cliffhanger. Your welcome for the long drama-packed chapter. I suck at thisss