ezria::forget me not

9

Forget Me Not

Chapter Nine

"...We are who we

are because of what we learn &

what we remember. Who am I then,

If my memory is impaired?"

-Mira Bartok

Ezra

It was cold.

I don't remember ever being in the snow, maybe there was a time that I was, but not that I could remember indefinitely. I had been in Rosewood for almost 24 hours. It was Friday, but I came on Thursday. I couldn't stand being in a house with Alison if it meant she would be pawing at me so I would collapse and give in to her like I usually did. She tried many other way to persuade me, but I assure you I didn't take the bate, nor was it appropriate enough to share.

I was on my way to see Aria at the bar she told me to meet her at. I couldn't lay my finger on it, but something about these streets had familiarity. Almost as if I had lived here for years. I turned on Hollis Way looking for Snooker's. My eyes scanned the perimeter until my gaze landed on the run down building. I parked my car on the other side of the street and made my way over to this unfamiliar place. It reeked of vomit and fried onions. Aria was sitting on a barstool, wearing grey jeans and a light pink t-shirt, topping it off with a bold black scarf and a thick black peacoat much like my own. She felt my eyes on her, causing her to look up. Her hazel eyes mixed with the darker lighting seemed to make them pop.

"Hey." Something was wrong. Her voice was shaky. Before I spoke up I peeled off my coat; the second she saw my shirt her face tightened. She turned back to the drink resting in her hands. I looked down at my navy blue thermal. Was I doing something wrong?

"Are you okay?" She avoided my eyes at all costs. It hurt a little bit not to see her face.

"Yeah." She turned back to me. She had a stray tear falling down her cheek.

What the hell? Why was I having these thoughts, getting these feelings for this girl? I'm married.

I had this desire, this need, this thing inside of me that I couldn't describe to make her happy. Something I did made her turn to mush, made her have a weak moment, I had already had my suspisions of Aria knowing something about me, but now it wasn't that she knew something, she knew me.

I had an all new feeling - a kind of determination. I wiped her cheek, feeling that same spark that was there from the brush of hands, to the kiss, leading up to now.

"Thanks," she muttered. I nodded, leading her to a booth so she couldn't avoid looking at me. She sat across from me, staring at her hands. "So what did you want to talk about?"

I played with my hands, to be honest I didn't need to talk about anything. I just needed to see her. She looked up from her hands, hesitantly looking me in the eye. Something. I saw it clearly.

I was sitting at the bar counter, the same one that was right in front of me. I walked over and looked over my own shoulder, trying to see what I saw so focused on.

Ulysses. The book that I could never finish. I smiled, remembering when Alison sat across from me before Marley was born and I would read to her on the couch. I diverted my attention back to a much younger me. I turned down to see a girl in a purple dress with boots staring at a missing poster of..Alison? I was beyond confused and I couldn't remember the face of this girl in a purple dress.

"Can I get a cheeseburger, please?" her voice immediately reminded me of someone, but I still couldn't put my finger on it. I saw the younger version of myself look up, take notice, and smile at the girl.