vision { yoonmin }

dear jimin

That winter had seemed to last forever. That winter after it happened. The winter after... Jimin. The trees were bare for longer, the snow lasted on the windowsill outside their apartment for longer, the birds were quieter. But after a while, they started to chirp again and the ice began to melt. And Yoongi, somewhat, did the same.

Yoongi knelt down into the grass, the fraying fabric of his jeans getting wet from the lightly frosted grass. His pale hands tinged red from the crisp air tentatively reached into his coat pocket, pulling the piece of lined paper. His breath trembled as he unfolded the crumbly page.

The words he had wanted to say for so long, that he had waited to let go of during the winter.

"Dear Jimin,

It has been so long since I have seen your smile or heard your laugh or kissed your lips. This winter has been especially cold without you. Without your voice ringing through the house in the mornings. Without your touch. Without... you. 

It has been hard. Some days I don't want to leave the house, or even get out of bed. But I know that you'd want me to move on, so I've been trying my best to be happy again. 

It's hard.

I've started making music again. This time, under my own name. You made me realise life is too short to be afraid of failure or ridicule or just... not being good enough. I even have an album coming out next month, I wish you were here to see it.

Something good has come from this cold winter, though. Namjoon and Seokjin have a daughter now. A bubbly, loud, adorable little girl who never stops smiling and never fails to tell everyone around that she's the most beautiful girl in the land. Guess what they called her?"

Yoongi took a deep shuddering breath as he felt the two cool rings hanging on the thin silver chain around his neck dance against his hot chest with every shuddery breath. His cheeks and nose as bright pink as the tips of his freezing fingers. A single burning tear danced down his cheek, leaving a warm wet streak where only freezing air had dared to touch. "Jimin. They called her... Jimin"

"I am not very good at explaining my feelings, and you know that Jimin. I used to bottle everything up. I don't know why I did it... I was innocent and young and stupid. And I regret it because I didn't get to tell you the things I should have told you. I should have told you that you are the most important thing to me. I should have told you that I didn't care what people said or what my parents said. I should have told you every day that I think you're beautiful... no, I think you are more than that. You are... Jimin.

You gave me so much... and more. You helped me through everything. You were always there with a crinkly-eyed smile and a gentle hug. No one... not even my parents had shown me the kindness and love you had. And for that, and you just being you, I am... eternally grateful."

He folded the paper and tucked it neatly into his sleeve. "I think... if you were still here. You would have dyed your hair pink, bubblegum pink with a hint of orange. Just like the sky, right now. Well, according to Little Jimin." Yoongi cracked a smile,

"지민, 보고 싶어요.

보고 싶다."