Dear Diary,
I feel trapped. I want to get away from all this. From the greed, the hateful words, the judgments. But that not possible. Every where I go I will find those things. But what I hate the most is the emptiness I feel when I’m alone and with people. All my life I feel as if someone were missing. As if that person were my other half. It makes me think. Is this my real life. Are these people I call parents my real makers. Are those sibling really mine. I feel so different from them. I feel out of place living with them. I do look like them but only partially. I have their controllable black long hair and their height. But my eyes were the most exotic green ever seen and they had dark brown eyes. I have those stereotypic Latina curves. It like I have them to perfection. I am a loner while the rest of my have lots of friends. I never fit in anywhere. Some people try to be my friend but I always make them run. I’m destined to be alone for the rest of my life.
“Maryetta. Breakfast is ready.” My mother said happily as always. I put my hair in a ponytail and go downstairs. I don’t bother with makeup.I never needed it or liked it. I sit next to my sister Luanne. She isn’t bitchy but she is a cheerleader. I have two sisters and a cute little brother. Luanne, Lana, Joshua. Lana is the oldest. She is suppose to be a senior last year but she stayed back, she isn’t very bright. I dislike her, she is the slut of the school and she would makes my life miserable but Luanne stops her. Luanne is the girl everyone wants to be and twin to Lana. I have to say she doesn’t like to do academic related work, but she is very smart. Joshua or Josh as he only lets me call him is my best friend. He and I are very close we tell each other everything. As long as it is PG because he is 7 years old. I feel wanted and normal with him. “Do you want pancakes honey.”
“Umph.” I say. They are used to those answer. That means yes and thank you. She puts 3 pancake on my plate. I take the syrup and drench my pancake with.
“Not too much honey.” I stop and quickly eat my breakfast. When I finish eating the pancake. I notice that Josh isn’t at the table.
“Where’s Josh. Doesn’t he have school.” They all looked shock I don’t say more than a one syllable words. I smile at them. They seem even more shocked.
“Omg. The devil talked.” Lana said. That snapped mom out.
“Young lady she is your sister. You be nice to her.”
“I don’t care who she is. For all I care she can go to hell.” Mom was angry now. Dad just stayed quiet. Mom was about to say something when I stopped her.
“Mom it’s okay. And you Lana. You speak to mother like that again and you’re the one who would be speaking.” Lana looked scared. Luanne looked both amused and worried. Mom’s expression was hidden by her beautiful face. But to me she looked amused. “Now apologize to mom.” Lana looked at mom.
“Sorry Mom. Can I leave now. Blake just texted me saying he was here.” Mom nods. Lana leaves.
“Bye mom. Bye dad. Brittany is here to get me.” Luanne says. “Bye Yetta.” I stick my tongue out. I don’t like it when people call me that. She smiles at me I do the same. Okay I’ way to happy. I’m acting un normal. But when I woke up it like it was going to be different. It felt as if it was going to be a good day.
“Young lady. No threats.” She says giving me the look. It says I’m both proud and disappointed in you. I smile at her. “You have a beautiful smile.”
“Sorry mommy . I’m going to help Josh. And can I take him to school. I never get to do that.”
“Sure. And you never get to do is because your lazy and over sleep.” I laugh. Then go to Josh’s room. “Josh do you need help.”
