Lost - LRH

Chapter 4

I lay in bed but awake to the sound of shoes shuffling. I don't bother to get up, knowing that the cause of the sound is my father getting home from work.

He is mumbling, probably on the phone. I don't hear much of what he says due to his hushed tone; however, I do catch fragments of his words. I hear a lot of "okay" and a lot of grunts signifying that he is agreeing to whoever is on the other side of the line. There are some words that catch my attention:

"Out"

"Samantha"

"Leave"

The words weren't continued in one sentence but they seemed to worry me. Out? What or who could be out? Samantha, who the heck is that? Leave? Will my father leave, will we be leaving?

I squirm in my bed at the thought of having my father leave. His fatherly figure left awhile ago but I still cherish his presence, even if he still avoids to directly speak to me.

I stay quiet, trying to hear more of my father's conversation but all I can hear is my heart beating in my ears. I manage to hear some more shuffling but the sound grows faint, he is probably walking down the hall to his room, mom's room.

I turn to my right and pick up my phone off the bedside table. I click the home button and see the screen flash in my eyes. I squint, making my eyes adjust to the bright light, 3:46 am. I have three more hours till I have to wake up and go to school, at least I'll be able to see my friend. I smile, as I referred to Luke as a friend. It feels odd but I'm sure I'll get use to it. I stare at the ceiling as my eyelids begin to grow heavy.

-

I stand over a chasm. I don't know where I am or how I got there but I go along with it. A pain is squeezing my chest, making it hard to breathe. I look down at myself, I am in a gown, an old fashion night gown. I look to my chest to see if anything is clenched around it, nothing. Where is this pain coming from? I feel a drop if water slide down my cheek, no not water, a tear. I feel multiple tears spill out of my eyes but I don't understand why. I look down into the chasm and see two pairs of hands. I bend a little to see who the hands belong to, there I see my mother and Luke hanging onto a ledge. I panick, they are slipping, they won't be able to hold on for much longer. My eyes widen, this is why I am crying, I know I can only save one. I look to my left and see my mother dangling above the chasm helplessly trying to keep hold of the ledge. She is not the mother I remember suffering on the hospital bed. Her hair is not thin and her green eyes shine, like they used to before she was diagnosed.To my right I see Luke, his eyes are squeezed shut as he tries to pull himself up, he fails and his hand slips. I run to him and grab his arm as it leaves the ledge. I manage to pull him up and I look over to where my mother is dangling. Had been dangling. She is no longer there, I let her fall to her death. I squat and cry, I cry until my breaths are short and I am gasping for air. I then look over at the chasm and run. I run to it. I throw myself over the chasm and I am swallowed by darkness.

-

I wake up, my eyes sore and my cheeks wet with tears. My body is shaking from the nightmare. I hug my knees and breathe deeply, trying to slow my heat rate. I look over to my phone as it buzzes. It is dimly lit and it is the only light in my pitch black room. I reach over and check the lock screen.

1 new voicemail

I stare at the number, it is unknown. I put the ear to the phone, the cold screen touches my cheek. I listen for the voicemail, nothing. Damn butt dial. I check the time at the top of the screen. 4:56 am. It had only been an hour since my father had gotten home, though it feels like years due to the horrifying dream.

I get up from my bed, I'm not sleepy so I might as well get ready. I open my bedroom door with a squeek. I look down the hall, my father's bedroom door is open, he must of left again. I sigh and walk over to the bathroom with a towel in hand.

I lock the door as I get into the bathroom, even though no one is home. I stare at my reflection on the huge mirror. My wavy brown hair is tousled into a bun, I put my hair down in waves. It is nearly at my waist, my mother never let me cut it, she loved long hair. I never did cut it, even after her passing. I stare into my own eyes, they are chestnut colored, like my father's. My eyes are dull but more lively than my father's, whose eyes appear grey. I stare at my face, long and slim, like my mother. No wonder my father doesn't dare to look at me, I look a lot like her.

I see my mother, desperately hanging onto the ledge. I try to shake the nightmare from my head but the image remains. I undress and step into the shower. I turn turn the handle and let the hot water flow over my body, in hope to loosen then tension of my muscles. I lather soap over my skin and massage my scalp with shampoo. I rinse and step out of the shower with a towel wrapped around my body. I stare once again at my reflection before reaching for my toothbrush. I brush my teeth then exit the bathroom. The cold air causes my exposed skin to have goosebumps. I walk into my room and flick on the light.

My room was small and simple, with a small walk in closet. I walk into my closet and grab a pair of skinny jeans, a black long sleeve, a brown sweather, and an olive green snow jacket. I dress and put on my winter socks, I brush out my hair and leave it down. I walk across the cold hardwood floor to my desk where assignments are scattered across it, the way I left it before I went to bed last night. I grab my backpack off the ground and organize all my papers and notebooks". I carry my bag over my shoulder and walk out of my room.

I walk down the hall into an opening, where the living room and kitchen is. I decide against breakfast due to my lack of appetite. I sit on a black couch and check the time, 5:50 am. I don't leave until 6:30. I reach over to the remote and waste my time by watching tv.

-

I watch a rerun of Big Bang Theory and turn off the tv. It is only 6:20 when I decide to leave my house. I take my brown boots and walk out, locking the door behind me.

It is no longer snowing but the snow is still fresh, causing me to sink into it with every step. I walk until I reach the path where Luke and I split. A smile creeps onto my lips as I remember the memories of yesterday. However my smile fades as I remember him hanging over a chasm. I continue to walk.

By the time I reach school, it is 6:55 am. Class doesn't start till 7:15. I walk through the halls of laughing highschoolers, bumping some shoulders on the way to my locker. I twist the lock with my combination.

28 twist right, 38 twist left, 28 pull

I open my locker and grab my science textbook for next period. I stand by my locker, pretending to read the textbook. I reread the same paragraph ten times until the bell rings.

I close my locker but I don't move, I wait till the halls clear to walk to my class. By now Luke would be at my side, walking with me but he didn't meet me at my locker this morning, as he always does. I shrug, he's probably already in class sitting at our desk.

I walk into the science laboratory as the bell rings. For once I am on time. I walk to the back of the room, where Luke and I usually sit, Luke isn't there. Maybe he'll come in later. Hopefully he'll come in later.