BONES AU - PART FOUR "Princess and the Pear"

INTRODUCTION

INTRODUCTION

On a treasure hunt from the day's comic convention, three kids dressed in fantasy cosplay came walking down a tunnel, one still in character.

"Lo, the cave where the princess doth dwell. Let the light of Mithryleen guide our path."

The other scrunched his nose. "Smells like ass in here, yo."

"Yo? Who is this Yo of whom you speak? I know him not."

"For real, Trev. Let's go back. Those other freaks are gonna beat us to the treasure, anyway."

"The name's Blackthorne, and you'd do well to remember it."

"Your name is Trevor Vertuca, and that is your mom's cell phone. Now call her to pick us up, or I will. This is getting old, right, Ezra?"

Ezra's eyes widened and he ran out screaming from in front of them. The two others went to investigate but were disappointed.

The adolescent not in character saw what Ezra saw and ran with him. "HEY WAIT FOR ME!"

"Look, I'm sorry about this. We don't usually break character, but... I mean, you have to dock points; I understand." He shone the cell phone light to see what is moving and sees that it's a body. "What the..." He screamed and ran out too.

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Scott knocked on Joe's door early the next morning. "Hey Joe! Open up!"

Joe got off the couch with a groan. His back was in pain. Again. "All right, all right, all right, I'm coming, it's... Just keep it down." When he opened the door, Scott came in instantly, making himself at home.

"What took you so long? And what's wrong with your back?"

"Nothing." He closed the door and scratched his bedhead. "How about some coffee?" He picked up the bean bag and said in mock surprise. "Arabian Bean!"

Scott snorted. "You hurt your back again?"

"No, no...no. It's that obvious, huh?"

Scott nodded. "Your gait suggests you re-strained your anterior longitudinal ligament."

Joe shrugged, not really knowing what that meant. "Yeah, well, I blame the couch, all right? I fell asleep last night watching the game. Look, I figured you fixed my back last time, really well, and I just thought that maybe you could fix it again, so use your little magic knuckles, and hit it up, and we're good to go."

Scott rolled his eyes. "Joe, if this has become a recurring problem, you should see a specialist."

"Right, I get it- all disclaimers apply. Here we go, hit the back-chop-chop. We got a case"

"No!"

"No? Last time I had this, you were begging to help me!"

"I probably shouldn't have touched you the last time. You need a medical doctor."

"I'm not asking you to perform surgery; just do what you did last time and fix it with your magic knuckles... Look, there's no one I trust more to get my back and crack it, than you." He pointed at Scott.

Scott snorted. "Wow."

"Want more?"

"No, that was effective. Turn around. Okay, ready?"

Joe hesitated for a moment. "Wait."

"What?"

"This is... This is awkward." He looked down at Scott's arms around him and felt his back pressed against his chest. "Very awkward."

"Oh, youre just saying that because we kissed. Now hush, we have a case, remember?"

Before Joe could get words out, he squeaked when Scott lifted him up and cracked his back. This did most definitely not help.

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