Just Simply, Them

IX.

- in which everything is quiet -

| 11:35 a.m.; Saturday |

SHE LEANED HER head on his shoulder, her hand gently grasping his as they sat in this moment swollen with affection and comfort. She had managed to calm enough to make the, probably smarter, decision—to not tell Tyler about Matt, at least not without asking him. And she didn't really plan on asking if she could tell her boyfriend that he was hopelessly, painfully in love with her. In the aftermath of the, very minor, anxiety attack, they had just laid in her bed, enjoying one another. Sometimes one of them would say something, but for most of it, including the current moment, they had laid in comfortable silence.

"You hungry?" Tyler's voice broke the sweet silence, and she was slightly taken off guard by the break. She let her eyes rest on his soft features for a moment, long enough to take it all in and readjust to the reality they were in.

"Yeah, sure. What do you want to eat?" She answered softly, almost as if she was trying to not disturb the silence any more than she had to. She liked the silence. She felt at home in it.

Tyler shrugged. "I don't care, babe. Your turn to pick."

She smiled and shook her head at her partner, wishing silently that he actually had made a choice this time. "What about...waffles?"

Tyler gave her a gentle smile, planting a soft kiss on her forehead. "Sounds wonderful." And with that, they went to make a new memory, pointless to everyone else, but so, so lovely to them.

| 3:12 p.m.; Saturday |

He laughed into the phone, a warm, cozy feeling rising in him that he chose to ignore. "Good one, Bren." Brendan was a friend from work, someone he'd known for practically all the time he'd been at the job. He found Brendan a very calming presence, and Matthew was drawn to him. They quickly bonded, and now they spend a great amount of time together. Matthew very much enjoyed being around Brendan.

"What can I say?" His friend replied. "I'm the master of jokes."

"Telling one good joke doesn't make you a master," Matthew playfully shot back.

"Oh, ouch, dude. That hurts." He laughed through his words, and Matthew caught himself laughing along with him. He didn't know what it was he had with Brendan, but he liked to sit in the feelings and let them raise his spirits for the coming moments. He knew that he felt oddly comfortable around Brendan, and he felt very much at home when met with his presence. He'd had a small stirring of affections for this boy when they'd first met, but when he started falling for Dillon, they washed away as quickly as they appeared. Now the air between them was one of friendship, a warm place to find solace in an otherwise terrifying reality. He'd never known if Brendan had ever felt anything for him; Hell, he didn't even know Brendan's sexuality. But frankly, to Matthew, it didn't matter. It wasn't like he would ever have a chance with this boy anyway—and if he did, he wouldn't jump at the chance because he simply did not feel for him anymore. He was hopelessly in love with Dillon, and now he was going to get over this one as well. "Hey, Matt. You still there?" Brendan laughed.

"Yeah. Just thinking."

"Mind if I ask what you're thinking about?"

"Uh, well..." He paused for a moment, wondering if he was ready to talk about it. "It's this girl." Matthew answered his friend nervously, not entirely sure how far into the story he was going to disclose to him.

"Ooo-la-la, Matty." He whistled jokingly, then let out a gentle chuckle. "Who is she?"

"That isn't really the important part. None of it really matters anyway. She doesn't feel the same way, and I've got to find a way to get over her." Maybe he'd tell Brendan who she was some other time. Maybe when it didn't hurt as much.

"That sucks, Matt, I'm sorry. How much did you like her?"

Matthew gulped anxiously, and he knew he was in for something he didn't want to be. "I, uh..." he began, and the tremble was far too apparent in his words. "I loved her. Do love her." Brendan remained silent for a moment, a moment swollen with brokenness and a pure doubt on what to say next. "I'm in love with her."

Brendan cleared his throat, and the sudden sound made Matthew's racing heart take a new spot in his throat. "Um," he said, "wow." Brendan had genuinely no idea how to contribute to the situation anymore, but he hated this awkward silence they had taken seats in. He really had no idea what to say. He wasn't sure if there was anything that was actually the "right" thing to say here. And so, for a long while, they sat frozen in the hideously uncomfortable silence, the rigid breaths the men took the only sound that made its way through the phones.

"Heavy, right?" Matt joked. He laughed nervously, waiting for his friend to respond, desperately waiting for this godawful silence to end.

"Ha, yeah. It is." Matthew let out a breath, thankful he hadn't scared Brendan away. "So what happened with you two anyway? That you have to 'find a way to get over her'?" He pressed.

"Long story very short, she just doesn't feel the same, and I don't want to just be miserable all the time." Matt tried to put it in such a way that would give enough up that Brendan wouldn't press for more.

"Well, I hope that one day I'll get to hear the whole story." Matt could hear the smile in his friend's voice.

"Maybe one day." Matt felt a smile rising on his own lips, and his cheeks grew a bit hot. He spent a second trying to figure out why, when Brendan interrupted his wonderings.

"I'll hold you to that, Matt." Matt chuckled at the sentiment. "I mean it. I better get that story someday."

"You will. I promise."

"Good." Brendan gave a small laugh, and then said his goodbyes. "I'll talk to you at work on Monday, okay?" Upon Matt's agreement, Brendan hung up, and Matt was left once again alone with his thoughts, the escape brought by Brendan now gone. He quickly began thinking about Dillon again. He thought about what she had said to him early that morning; she had offered so much, and he had turned it down, and it crushed him a little, but made him feel worlds better at the same time. It was odd, really, the way the whole situation was playing through in his mind. He loved her so much, and he wanted so badly to be with her, but he had no desire to make her do something she didn't want to. Her forcing herself to love him was entirely off the table to him.

There was no way in Hell he would let that happen.

| 9:52 p.m.; Saturday |

As she lay in Tyler's arms, her tired mind drifted to Matthew, and she thought about the whole situation again, but she remained strangely calm this time. She had started to process everything that had transpired and was starting to come to terms with it.

Tyler shifted a bit in his sleep, now lying flat on his back, one arm underneath her and the other resting on his stomach. She rolled over to face him, studying his profile, watching his chest rise and fall slightly with his breaths, and she felt at peace. His presence always made her feel comfortable, something she wasn't used to. It was a nice feeling to not be so anxious all the time.

It felt good. It felt really good.