Of Flowers and Fire

Chapter 6

Sawyer sat at his desk making small marks into his calender, cellphone playing quiet music next to a half full mug of oolong tea. He looked up when Diego came in and crossed the floor. He leaned against the desk and frowned. His hands were pressed flat to the surface and he leaned at the hips. Sawyer met his eyes. Radiant and inquisitive.

Sawyer checked the small aluminum clock next to a small, perky vase of orchids. "You're here early," he noted, pushing up his glasses and making a few more scribbles in his calender.

"We need to have a talk," Diego said calmly. Sawyer didn't look up at him, but he did remove his glasses and rub his eyes.

"Not today, Diego," Sawyer sighed shaking his head.

"Sawyer," Diego intoned. Demand, not question.

Sawyer held his head in his hands, folded under his chin. "Some other time," he protested thinly.

"It's important," Diego whined.

Sawyer raised his eyes and his voice slightly, "Diego, I can't today."

Diego watched him for a second. He watched the pain sparking behind Sawyer's eyes. He watched the way Sawyer's hand, trembling, grasped the mug and raised it to his lips. He watched Sawyer's Adam's apple bob as he swallowed, and then, Diego spoke. "I'm sorry."

"You don't need to apologize," Sawyer said.

"Yes, I do." Diego shook his head a little and clenched his fists before diving them into the pockets of an orange jacket. "I've been a dick, you know, leading you on."

Sawyer exhaled, "Diego, today isn't the day for this talk."

"It has to happen," Diego told him, staring deeply at the date circled four times in Sawyer's calender. The wedding day. "It has to happen before then," he said gesturing to the date.

"It can wait one day," Sawyer said standing and leaning slightly forward in an act of hopeful intimidation.

"Why can't we talk about it today?" Diego asked whirling around when Sawyer left the desk and went over to the refrigerator case beside the front door wordlessly.

"Because today is too important already," Sawyer finally said and he gathered up a bouquet of one dozen red roses. He walked past Diego to perch behind his desk again and took a pad of paper from the top shelf of the desk. He wrote something inside the paper but folded it and stuck it in the bouquet before Diego could read what it said. "I have to leave the shop," Sawyer told him as he pulled a jacket off of the hook in the back room.

Diego looked at him quizzically, and furrowed his eyebrows. "Where are you going?" He asked.

"That's not important to you," Sawyer sighed buttoning up his gunmetal gray jacket. "You can stay here," Sawyer shrugged and gestured to his office. "I'll be back shortly." He nudged his way past Diego with the bouquet in hand and left the shop letting the door jingle shut.

Diego turned and looked out the door, following Sawyer across the street until he couldn't be seen anymore. "What the fuck?" Diego asked shaking his head weakly. He turned the sign to closed but didn't lock the door. Diego looked around the shop realizing how much of the light came from Sawyer instead of the two large bay windows beside the door. Diego looked at his office and then up at the iron staircase in the corner. He glanced over his shoulder at the door, and then looked back at the staircase. He started toward it and realized, wow, he was really going to do this.

The apartment at the top of the stairs was unlocked and untidy, just like the last time he'd been up there. The room at the end of the hall was open, but Diego decided against going in there in favor of the door at the other end of the space. The room Sawyer hadn't shown him on their impromptu tour.