Isla and I both groan at the alarm. Our hands meet when we both attempt to hit snooze on the clock between our beds. My sister pulls her covers up and holds a pillow on her head, but I kick off the covers and get started. I hardly slept last night, but my nerves are on the fritz.
The car ride to the Hub, where the Choosing Ceremony will take place, is long. I press my forehead against the cold window and stare outside. I do not hold Isla's hand.
Outside, Dauntless jump on and off the ever-moving trains that run throughout the city, and Abnegation take buses. I smile.
After we arrive, we take an elevator up twenty levels, and then we enter the room where we will decide our fate. The factions stand in concentrated clusters. The gray Abnegation and blue Erudite are silent, but the black and white Candor and pure obsidian Dauntless are loud and rowdy. Red and yellow Amity converse in hushed voices.
In the center of the room, there is a raised platform with a podium towards the back. In front of the podium are five giant steel jars, big enough to hold my tiny mother, who barely clears five feet. Inside each of the jars is some material to represent each factions; plain gray Abnegation stones, earth for Amity, glass for Candor, lit coals for the Dauntless and water for Erudite. When my name is called, I will walk up and accept a knife. I will then slit my hand and sprinkle my blood on the substance of the faction I choose. Then I will give the knife back and join my new faction.
My blood spattering on glass. My blood sizzling on coals.
The responsibility to host the Choosing Ceremony falls on different factions every year, and this year is Dauntless. A tall girl, Taylor Carson steps up behind the podium and prepares the opening speech.
The sixteen-year-olds of each faction arrange themselves in alphabetical order, so I am between Kaitlyn Welch and my sister. We will go in reverse, so Isla will choose before me.
Our parents stand before us. My mother kisses my sister and I's heads, and our father says, "See you soon." Without a trace of doubt. I will not see him soon. I will not choose Erudite. He is wrong.
They join the other Erudite, and when I try and find their faces, I cannot. It is not required that every faction member attend the ceremony, but there are enough present I lose my mother and father's face in a sea of ultramarine.
Taylor Carson clears her throat and begins, and I cannot help but stare at her lip rings, which shimmer in the light. Why the Dauntless thing it is brave to pierce their body in so many ways, I do not know. But it makes them unique.
"Welcome to the Choosing Ceremony," Taylor says. "Welcome, welcome to the day we honor the democratic philosophy of our ancestors, which tells us that every man or woman has the right to choose his or her own way in this wold."
Isla smiles at me.
"Our dependants are now sixteen," Taylor continues. "They stand on the precipice of adulthood, and it is now up to them to decide what kind of people they will be." Taylor is an excellent public speaker; she has a way of making every word interesting. "Decades ago, our ancestors realized that it is not political ideology, religious belief, race or nationalism that is to blame for the warring world. Rather, they determined that it was the fault of human personality--of humankind's inclination towards evil, in what whatever form that is. They divided into factions that sought to eradicate those qualities they believed responsible for the world's disarray."
I look between the factions. I blame all qualities are responsible for our faults.
"Those who blamed aggression formed Amity." The red and yellow peaceful faction grinned amongst themselves. They are kind and loving and happy. Nevertheless, I have not even considered joining them.
"Those who blamed ignorance formed Erudite." Instead of smiling with the others, I grimace. I cannot wait to leave this faction.
"Those who blamed duplicity formed Candor." I look at the Candor. They wear black and white, because that is how they see the world. Wrong and right. Charcoal and alabaster. I hide the corners of my mouth turning upwards with a hand.
"Those who blamed selfishness formed Abnegation." I do blame selfishness. Someday, the world will fall because of that--again.
"And those who blamed cowardice were the Dauntless."
Black. Pure black, black as black, black as void. I long to run with them.
But I long to be with the Candor as well.
I do not know what to do.
Taylor continues to speak. "Working together, these five factions have lived in peace for many years, each contributing to a different sector of society. Abnegation has fulfilled our need for selfless leaders in government; Candor has provided us with trustworthy and sound leaders in law; Erudite has supplied us with intelligent teachers and researchers; Amity has given us understanding counselors and caretakers; Dauntless provides us with protection from threats both within and without. But the reach of each faction is not limited to these areas. We give one another far more than can be adequately summarized. In our factions, we find meaning, we find purpose, we find life."
Faction before blood, our motto is.
Taylor says, "Apart from them, we would not survive."
It is silent.
"Therefore this day marks a happy occasion--the day on which we receive our new initiates, who will work with us toward a better society and a better world," Taylor finishes. A round of applause comes. I do not clap.
The first girl, Cate Zephyr, is also our first transfer. She leaves Dauntless and lets her blood drip into Amity soil. She is a traitor to her faction. Just as I will be.
Names are called, and blood drips. I watch, numb, as people come and go from their born faction. They become initiates, while I am still just me.
Waiting.
Our friends, Nehemia, Cassy and Tom all choose to stay in Erudite. Frank surprises me by joining Dauntless.
Isla's name is called, and for a second, we just stand there. I reach out and grasp her hand, tightly. She tugs, but I do not let go. "Elysium!" she says. "Ellie, let go."
And I do. She is no longer with me, her fingers ripped away from mine. In that moment, I know I have lost my sister. Goobye, Isla.
She takes the knife and cuts herself. She steps outward and holds her arms to her chest. And then it is thrust outwards and her blood is not turning Erudite water a deper shade of red. It is not staining Candor glass or making popping noises on Dauntless coals. But it also isn't mixing with Amity soil.
It has splattered on Abnegation stones.
Erudite's enemy. Isla has joined them. Despite my horror, I am proud of her. As she passed I grin. She returns it, despite the fact she is not my sister anymore. Not really.
And now it is my turn. "Elysium Williams!" Taylor says, and I step up. I accept the knife, glinting silver under blue lanterns. It is stained with scarlet.
As I walk up to the jars, my heart jumps to my throat. I was confident before, but now I don't know what to do. I look back, and this time I do find my parents. My mother is sobbing, but my father's face is beat red. Can I do this to them?
I glance at the Erudite jar.
Yes, I can.
I square my shoulders and throw them back, tilting my chin upwards. I slit my palm open and watch a ribbon of crimson grow and thicken.
Candor. Dauntless.
Choose, I think. Choose now.
I am more brave than I am honest. I know that. It is not a matter of what I want--it is a matter of what I am.
I hover my hand over the flames and look straight at my parents with a straight face. I watch their expressions turn from hopeful to furious as my blood drip, drip, drips into the coals. They watch as I strut down from the platform and join the ranks of the Dauntless.
