Under Influence

Chapter two: Ecstacy

Making my out of the police station to my parents car. In my imaginative state I don't pay attention to what my parents are yelling. Later that night I sneak out my once again to see Jesse. Our friends are nowhere to be found. "What did the cops ask you?" Jesse asked me probably thinking I gave up our spot. Well I did, I'm not going down for this and for getting caught in a lie. "Every thing they could about that night and I answered everything I could. Last I saw her she was going to the back room with some random guy. I didn't do anything, I was with you all night. Babe I never hurt her." He strokes my black shiny curly hair as he put the beer can to his lips with his other hand.  His buddies around sniffing cocaine and popping whatever pills they can, I look at them with the simple thought in mind. Am I one of them? Am I a low life junkie who only parties and does drugs? Feeling like I need a change in my life but that doesn't mean I'm going to do it. "I got to meet someone now I'll see you soon" one of his friends say. All Jesse response with is "make sure you actually sell him what he thinks he's buying this time." They had a habit of giving people the wrong drugs on purpose. They think they are doing one thing, they are inhaling something way worse. I always wonder how people can sit back and do cocaine and heroine, hell I never smoked anything but a cigarette and weed. Wishing I was still a little girl watching Hannah Montana or other Disney shows, those were the people I wanted to be like, I wonder what happened and how I fell into this life. I get up, put my jacket on and walk out the door, I don't say goodbye, just go down the stairs of the crappy run down apartment that never seems to have elevators. I walk two blocks down to my apartment, my parents were in the living room waiting for me. Once I again I ignore the yelling from the ones who no longer want me out the house. The next day isn't any different, another day I skip school to hangout with a bunch of my lowlife friends. Smoking weed in jesse's apartment where we won't be caught for the fact that he lives on his own and he's 21. His apartment so smoky you can hardly see each other, I have a habit of wondering why this is my life, why I live in the crappy apartments but love it at the same time. we stay there all day doing nothing but smoking all we have, seeing your normal daily roach crawl by and watching watching lifetime movies with the occasional joke that our lives are one. Now, here's where something innocent went wrong. The rest of Jesses gang come through the door with they're small white zip lock bags with white powders and pills. They sit with us smoking up what we had but later convinced us that there stuff was better. We did one think that is talked about a lot and always used in the clubs, ecstasy, as it leads to truth spilling out, us not knowing what the fuck we are saying or doing, or saying and doing things we know but can't control. Who knew it would lead to such bad things. To find out that Vanessa was sleeping with Bella's boyfriend, and even after she died. What they really thought of Bella being a slut that embarrassed the group, or how Sarah's dad is supposedly sleeping with a girl at our school who happens to be in a cult. Most shockingly, why Bella was killed and what Bella has done.
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She was that girl that every wants to be, no one would want to hurt her, every one loved her, or so we thought. Her death was a shock to the school but only for a bit of time. It's nothing new to us down in our grounds. I knew her since first grade, from getting scars on the playground together, our first dates and first times, to growing to being literally shit. You'd think she was a good white girl, she wasn't. She sold drugs, did drugs and had a habit of sleeping with the most creepiest guys. It's no lie that she had an STD or two. That guy I saw her with that night, no doubt in my mind she hasn't been with him before. Somehow that fact that it is New York and you may see a face once and never again after starts making the thought go away. She was your basic party girl who ended up in the wrong place at the wrong time and turned up dead. The only reason why I was ruled out as a suspect is because they found seamen in her. Fucking creep. You'd never expect it to happen to the people you share your whole childhood. Truth is, it can happen to anyone.
Taking me out of my thoughts, Jesse picks me up and carries me to his room. "Your sleeping here with me tonight" he says with a little kiss on the head. He pulls me closer putting his arms around me and falling sound asleep. Jesse was your typical bad boy with dark silky soft hair and dark shining eyes, tan skin so beautiful with the perfect smile. He has tattoos down is arms and chest with his ears and lip pierced, on top of that he has a tattoo on is his inner lip where if I bite it down you'll see it. He was perfect and I was happy to have him. It kills me to say but this story isn't about how I got him or had him, it's about how I did the unthinkable, how I lost him.