Under Influence

Chapter 3: HAZE

I woke up to Jesse next to me still asleep, his hair messy and perfect. I roll out and go to the bathroom, I fix myself up and kiss Jesse goodbye even though he still isn't awake, I walk home to show and get in some clean clothes. I text Jesse to let him know where I went so he won't be completely lost when he wakes. Once again it's an argument with my parents who tell me the same things. "You have no life, your ruining your future, you have no respect"  and it always ends with me saying "fuck you" and walk out the door. Only this time, my bed was made so neat and my night stands and dresses were completely wiped down an empty. My clothes in bags by the doors and my journal. They found and read my journal which goes in the so much detail about the partying, the drinking, and having sex with my drug dealer boyfriend. My whole life was revealed to them. Their little girl. Except for the fact that I wasn't. This argument ended in "I want you OUT of my house!"  I take my bags and sit at the corner. I call Jesse at least 10 times till he finally woke, the raspy voice in the phone told me he was still sleeping. "They kicked me out, I'm on the corner with my bags." I told him knowing that I always have a home wherever he is. He shows up in a good three minutes and helps grabs my bags. I guess this is how I move in with him for the first time. We walk into the his apartment and put my bags down. I decided to skip school and I sat on the couch and put my hair up exposing that tattoo of the moon on the back of my neck. Jesse leaves the apartment without a word and I just turn on the tv.

• • •

As Jesse walks down the street, cigarette in hand not really knowing what he wants to do next. He had just gotten into a fight. His buddies back in the abandoned building trying to figure out what to the the body of the guy Jesse had just killed. Jesse calls me in a angry voice like he didn't care, he wasn't worried, he was just angry. He tells me everything, how that guy found out that the guys have been selling them completely different and blamed the leader. "I told them, I told them to sell it right, they just don't fucking listen and now look. Someone's dead for their stupidity." At this point I don't know what to do or say. Jesse just told me a guy is dead and it's because he had killed him. I was worried that he'd get locked up, but at the same time he was in good hands with people who have gotten away with murder before.
• • •

It's 11:30 and we are all dressed getting ready to go. I grab my purse and me and Jesse head out to the train station. That's where we always met, this is the first time we will being going back to the club without Bella. It feels empty without her and when her parents found out what she was into they disowned her even though she was already dead. Tears, maybe, but definitely not a funeral. We were the only ones on the train and we are telling jokes and have fun like always. Me and Jessica run down the isle and start using the poles as if we were stripping. The boys taking videos and posting them on Snapchat for all to see. We were that group that was always out, always having fun and that group everyone wanted to be part of. I don't know why people would want to be a part of a group of junkies but I guess it's the same reason I am. When you see your future going nowhere, you just stop caring about what your doing with your life.

• • •
Present day.
"Ms. Sumners, we found you in a warehouse full of dead bodies covered in blood that wasn't yours, how do you explain that?" The officers asked me. "I don't know, I said I don't fucking know" I respond. I do, I remember everything but if I give it up, we all are done. "You have no one left to protect Saylor, your boyfriend is dead and we know you had something to do with it." Dead, Jesses dead and this was my doing. From the simple fact that when the police showed up I had a gun in my mouth ready to shoot. They take me away and from the way iv been acting, I'm completely insane in there eyes. They take me away and back to my room, no I wasn't in jail, I was in a mental asylum, I would be one of the crazy people with messed up hair in chunks, pale skin, white lips, eyes sharp when I look at you. You'd be scared of me but you know I wouldn't hurt you because I was the one with the big white boxes on my hands to stop from hurting myself. This is what my life came to.

• • •
We walk into the club and right away start our routine, drinking, dancing, drugs. All of it. Guys all over the girls, girls under dressed showing to much as always trying to find a guy. Not judging, I stick with Jesse the whole time and I follow him to the back, he walks into the alleyway and up to a black car. "Drug deal" is what I automatically assume. Honestly it was way worse. He had been talking to his father, Jesse never wanted him around me for reasons I wasn't able to know but soon figured out. Jesse's father was a sex trafficker, he thought of his dad saw me he'd try to sell me. I never went around when his father was there, and I can't exactly sell him out. Once I figured it out I walked back in the club. I always thought that I was a bad person for keeping this secret, all these girls being taken of their innocents and being sold for sex and pretty soon end up dead. I shake myself out of my thoughts and go find my friends, but I notice none of them are around. I go back out to find Jesse and he is gone as well. I call him and after 3 rings he answers, I ask him where we went and he responds vaguely with "I have business" I decided to get on a train back to his apartment. It was around 3:00 am already. I took a shower and got into comfortable clothes. I decided to clean up a little bit and then relax. I sit on the couch and put on Netflix and look through. I decided on The Vampire Diaries since that's the show Iv been binging on.