She ripped apart her sharpener, to take the blade.
She picked up the blade and for once she felt in control, of her mind,body,emotions.
She started at her ankle. Knowing people were less likely to see it because of Winter.
When it didn't bleed she got confused, annoyed, like nothing ever goes right in her life...
So she moved to her calf. But this time she pushed down hard. Harder. And harder. Right when she was about to give up, she saw that little drop of hope, of control.
For the first time in a while, she felt real. Like her emotions were back in her control.
People kept saying how bad it hurt but it didn't hurt her at all.. Maybe that was because the blade wasn't sharp enough.. Maybe that was because she wasn't looking for pain, just hope. Who knows? There really could be anything.
Everything her family tried to teach her to stay away from she became. I guess there really isn't a way to be a good parent. Everything you do or try to teach, it won't matter. Society matters. Only society.
