Images of the Past

Prologue

-2 years ago-

As I walk down the sidewalk, I notice the leaves that are starting to change colors. The once dark green leaves that are now slowly turning into an orange-red, slowly falling off the trees as they become bare and empty. I look toward the pond that I am walking up to and see a flock of ducks, swimming around in the water. The mother duck leading the little yellow ducklings around. I sit down at the edge of the creaky old dock that went out above the water and looked up at the dark grey clouds that form above my head. I then slowly look down at my feet watching as they swing back-and-forth. When did everything in my life go completely and utterly wrong? Why did that drunken fool decide to get into the car on this day? Why did my mom have to go to the store at that moment? Why did she have to die like this? Why did she have to die at all? A million questions and scenarios run through my brain trying to put the pieces together.

I suddenly feel something wet and cold hit my cheek, I look up at the sky and notice that it's starting to rain. I think I need to move, get up and go home, but my body doesn't move. I sit still not able to move a single muscle in my body, frozen in time from the news that I had just heard 30 minutes ago. My mother is dead. The one person in my life that was there for me for anything that I ever needed. The person who helped with stupid high school drama, the one who went shopping with me, gave me anything and all the love in the world. The most loving and caring woman in the world is now dead, because of a person who decided it would be a good idea to be drunk while driving.

Tears stream down my red cheeks as I stare down at the ripples in the water from the raindrops. I noticed that the rain is suddenly pouring down harder. I need to move, to walk, anything to clear my brain. Deciding on it, wiping my tears away and get enough courage to stand up. I slowly pull my feet up, which sat over the edge of the brown wooden dock. I stand up and slowly start walking toward any direction other than my house.

I cross my arms, looking in front of me staring off into space, not blinking once. I suddenly hear a car horn to my left and see my brother's red jeep pull up next to me. I suddenly come to a stop as Braydon rolls down the passenger window shouting my name. When I see his face I notice his eyes are also red and swollen from crying. 

"Hey.. please get in?" he slowly says to me.

At first, I don't reply to him, I simply just stare at the ground not even blinking. In shock from everything, I have heard from today.

"Casie please?" I look up at my older brothers sad blue eyes, I notice how much pain and sadness was in his eyes. I can see that he is struggling and trying so hard to keep it together for the both of us.

I let out a sigh, giving in and grab the door handle. We drive toward our house in silence, not a single word is said between us. I look out the window at the water streaming down the street. I watch as the raindrops slide down the window as they race eachother to the bottom of the glass. Lightning struck behind the houses that we are passing by causing me to snap out of my gaze. I finally take a moment to look around and notice my surroundings. Noticing that we are pulling onto our street to our house. 

The car comes to a stop in the driveway of our house. I sit still for a moment not wanting to make the effort to get out of the car and walk into my home where all the memories of my mom are.

"Cas you've got to get out of the car. I know this is tough for you- hell it's tough for all of us. But you've got to get out to show mom that you're stronger than this." Braydon stands at my side of the car with the door open attempting to get me out.

The words coming out of Braydon's mouth mean absolutely nothing to me. I know what he is trying to do. He is trying to make me forget that this has happened and that mom isn't dead. I repeatedly shake my head 'no' looking down at my shaking hands that lay on my lap. "Just leave me alone," I whisper in a quiet hoarse voice.

I slowly look up into Braydon's eyes silently telling him that I just need a moment. He looks at my face and brushes a piece of hair out of my face, slowly nodding his head he shuts the passenger side door and walks towards the front door of our house.

Once he disappears into the house I break down into sobs. When will this pain ever end? I know everyone always says it will get better. But in my case, I don't know how this could ever get better. No one in this world could ever replace the love I had for my mother. Ever.