{20} Sir Cumberbatch the Fourth

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~Angel~

"We're doing the baby project, Angel." Mrs Miller tells me.

"We don't actually have to make babies, do we?" I question stupidly.

"Are you stupid? Of course not." River shakes his head. "But if you really want to, I won't stop you."

"Shut up, Forest."

"Anyway," Mrs Miller interrupts us. "I will be choosing your partners and you will each get a fake baby which eats, cries and...poops like any normal baby. It has a score tracker on it's back, with 30 points. If you do something wrong, like forgetting to feed it, you will lose a points and so on. You're aiming to keep the 30 points until this project is over, which will be in one month. You will pick a piece of paper out of this bowl," she holds up a small plastic bowl. "Which determines whether you will be getting a girl or a boy."

"Ooh." I nod in understanding.

"Partners are Sally and Ben,

Jake and Chloe,

Lucy and Nate,

Mei-Lyn and Cameron,

Candice and Will,

And Angel and River."

River and I high-five. "Hell yeah!"

*~*

"Angel, we are not naming our child Sir Cumberbatch the Fourth!" River exclaims, shaking his head. "We don't even have a first, let alone fourth!"

"Why not?!" I pout. So, we got a baby boy and here we are, debating on what to name him.

"Do you want the piece of plastic to be teased for the rest of his one-month-long life?" River questions rhetorically, running a hand through his brown hair.

"Don't listen to him, child. You're not a piece of plastic." I gasp dramatically, holding the doll to my chest and covering his ears. "Daddy's just mad you have a fiddle instead of a widdle."

"What the fuck is a widdle?" River questions, confusion covering his face.

"I don't know, I just needed a word that rhymed with fiddle because fiddle and widdle sounded much better than penis and vagina!"

"Okay...anyway, I think we should name him Ryder."

"Sir Cumberbatch the Fourth, it is!"

"Angel!"

"That's my name." I reply, holding Sir Cumberbatch the Fourth in my arms.

"We are not naming our child Sir Cumberbatch the Fourth!"

*~*

"I can't believe I agreed to name our child Sir Cumberbatch the Fourth just because you gave me the puppy dog face." River complains, not taking his bright green eyes off the road as he drives to my house.

"What can I say? I guess I'm just that damn adorable." I smile innocently with Sir Cumberbatch the Fourth in my arms.

"Can't deny that." He agrees. "Sir Cumberbatch the Fourth, your mommy is weird...but it's cute."

"Sir Cumberbatch the Fourth, your daddy is ugly...but you're cute and you got that from me." I say, grinning cheekily at River, who rests a hand on my knee.

"Sir Cumberbatch the Fourth, your mommy's just asking to be punished."

"Excuse you, Forest, but our son doesn't need to know that shit just yet."

"Yeah, whatever, mommy." He teases.

It's quiet for a few moments until...

"Wait, I won't actually have to breast feed this thing, will I?"

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