The Book Of Quotes

IX

"Dear first love,
I do not know how it happened. I couldn't even tell you when it happened. All I know is that I was completely in love with you but suddenly, it was over and my love started dissipating for you. Please understand, it didn't just leave. I went through hell and back, not knowing how to deal with the love you left behind. I thought it was something I'd never be able to get over. I was so overwhelmingly in love with you that I just couldn't believe that we had no future together anymore and that was hard to swallow because there was a time where I once saw you as my entire future. My mind went astray with the thought of you during cold nights, wishing we were sharing body heat for one last time. It felt as though I'd never been able to erase your name from my memory. But something happened. Like I said, I don't know when or how, or possibly even why, I just know that it stopped hurting. Your name didn't feel like a sharp knife embedded into my heart,it faded away like a dull blur that I had trouble remembering. I could drink dark coffee without thinking how your lips tainted that very same mug once before. I was able to pass by the places that hold memories of the past us laughing away into the night, with Mexican food in our mouth and love in our eyes, with a huge smile on our faces. There was no longer any sadness that used to drain my entire body with heaviness when my thoughts ran through these memories like wildfire. Just an acknowledgement that we were in each other's lives at one point of time in this universe. I'm no longer sad about us anymore. Truth is, if we were meant to be, we would have been. It's just a shame that we were lessons rather than the real thing because had we learnt our lessons before meeting each other, we could have been the real thing, you know? The big love that everyone talks about. All of the movies, songs and poems about love; we would have been the epitome of love itself. I truly believe that. But I am happy that we happened. Because I now know how it truly feels to love someone and have it taken away from you. It's given me the biggest lessons of my life. I now know when to admit when I'm wrong, how to support someone when they need you to, how to not hold back in love just because you're scared of the outcome and most importantly, how to love someone without wanting anything in return. Just for the complete sake of loving them. God, I'm scared. I've met someone new and I'm terrified of messing it up. But this time around, I'm not holding back. I have a heart full of love and this time, I'm going to do it right. So, thank you for being a part of my life. Thank you for the lessons and thank you for teaching me how to love somebody properly.
Goodbye, first love.
Hello, my last love (hopefully)"

-Nadia Haitham
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P.S: hey guys this is not about me I was just trying to get the feeling of a breakup and moving on to someone new. I never even had a boyfriend to start with haha. I was just trying to write a girl's diary/a letter. Hope you guys liked it! Love you guys a lot and thanks for the support!❤️

xxx
Nadia Haitham