curiousers under way

Part 24 -Strawberry Danish

I was always surprised by the short days at the end of December. It was only five in the afternoon, as Licia, Miguel and I left Silverwood School, and it was already dark.

An intercontinental sized tour bus was stuck in the middle of the snow-clogged street. It was covered with large Chinese characters, the only English language words we could see were Pearl River Tours.ca, Montréal.

Two men were digging casually away at the snowbank in front of the bus. I had an uneasy feeling when three large men, wearing Senators' hockey team shirts, climbed off. So as soon as the workmen dropped their snow shovels. I yelled, 'Run!'

But it was too late. More men poured off the bus and we were picked up like bags of rice and carried on to the bus. It all happened so quickly. With two guys hanging onto my arms and legs I was unable to do more than squirm. As soon as we were on board, the bus accelerated down the street with our captors reeling down the aisle until they threw us into the seats. I was in the last group aboard so I ended up near the driver with my face jammed against the window and the gorilla-like guy wedged into the aisle seat next to me. He was holding me with one sticky, fat hand and eating a strawberry Danish with the other. Miguel ended up just behind me with Licia further back.

As the surprise of our abduction wore off, I twisted around and pushed myself up for a better view of the commotion going on behind me. My view over the high seat backs was restricted but I watched Licia deck one of the men as two more forced her into the seat behind Miguel. She was threatening someone with dire consequences if he didn't release her arm but there were at least a four men standing in the aisle and more sitting down, so she eventually decided to quit fighting. Meanwhile, just behind me, Miguel was still wrestling with his personal guard. I squirmed around as I heard a familiar voice. Just in front of me, two men in suits were talking to the driver. Agents Cornelius Black and Andy White.

Licia yelled, 'It's the Bunglers!'

My gorilla stuck the Danish into his mouth, shifted one sticky hand to my shoulder and forced me back down into my seat. 'Let me go!' I yelled into one of his elephantine ears. 'You have no right to detain us.'

He recoiled slightly and glared at me but couldn't say anything, his mouth was stuffed with the Danish. Strawberry jam smeared his chin and the front of his hockey shirt.

'Ziff's right,' Licia voice was muffled. 'Stop the bus and let us off.'

Behind me Miguel seemed to be winning a wrestling contest because my gorilla stood up ponderously and moved back to assist in subduing Miguel. I jumped up onto his back, hooked my arm around his neck and attempted to twist his head around. That didn't work so I hooked my fingers into his sticky nostrils. It felt gross but it worked, his head came back easily until he twisted away with a grunt leaving bogies and strawberry jam all over my fingers. I wiped my fingers on his hockey shirt.

Andy White grabbed my arms and pushed me back into my seat but I bounced up as soon as he let me go. 'You are detaining us illegally,' I yelled at him.

His black face showed a set of perfect white teeth in amusement. 'Okay, enough already. We are authorized by the Secretary for Homeland Security to detain anyone during a national security event. This is a clear and present emergency. Someone is threatening the safety of all citizens. We are under attack as we speak.'

'You are not even Canadians!' Miguel shouted. 'You are outside your jurisdiction.' He gasped as two gorillas sat on him.

'Get off him! Licia screamed. 'You'll break his ribs. Security guards have no right of arrest. I demand to speak to my lawyer.' She stood up and started to punch a number into her cell phone. A guard snatched it from her hand and tossed it to Andy.