The Monster Within Me

Laura

I know where I must go. Balcony. I must see the world one last time, even if all else is being taken away. My feet make the turns, my heart leads the way, since my head can't think straight. All that is consumed in my head is the fact that I may never see the outside world again. I run through the library, run past the volumes of books, throw open the glass balcony doors, and take a breath of sea-air, my first free breath since I overheard the king and queen. Sooner, rather than later though, reality hits. Strong and hard.

"No!" I cried into my palms, legs collapsing, folding underneath me. "No!" If they lock me up, I must leave. If they forbid me from seeing the outside world, I must escape. I will find my sister, no matter the cost. I must! Family before anything. "We are a family. And family means that we will always find each other. I will find Autumn! I must!"

"Maybe I can help?" A voice behind me says. My eyes dart up, scared, and with a sigh of relief, I realize that it's only a kitchen hand, not the queen, come to scold me. "I'm Laura Mills. You are Alissa, correct? The king's foster daughter?" The girl looks to be about my age, but with darker blue eyes, and strawberry blond hair, tangled, and pulled back into a bun. Average height, you would think she was a younger version of my lost older sister. Except a sadder version, wearing a dress of rags. Looking so different than me, with my ice eyes, dark hair, small build, and this purple dress.

"He is not my father. My parents are dead." I say, trying to put strength in my voice, lifting my hands from my face to look her in the eye. The look on the girl's face shows sympathy, and is that longing? 

"Mine are too." Laura says, and those words are enough to spark a connection in me. We are both orphans. Alone in this world, and the next. We have no-one left. Just us. She sits down next to me, both of us looking out over the water city, quiet and still. After a moment of silence, Laura continues, "I'm serious. Maybe I can help? Even though I am only a kitchen hand, I do know a few fair secrets."

"Like what?" I ask, intrigued. Maybe she knows something that can get me out of here, get me to my sister. And get her out of here too. Because I know that look. The look of wanting to be free. I know that the castle is her prison too. I feel her need of adventure. Laura opens her mouth, a spark in her eyes, when a large banging startles the two of us.

"Alissa, come on now." Turning my head, my eyes land on the speaker. Tall, fair, naturally, it's Eliza, come to lead me to my doom. Come to trap me inside. I will not allow it if I can. I try to be strong. The only problem is that being strong is hard. I believe that it takes more courage to try to be brave than to be brave. So mustering all the courage I have, I stand up.

"Eliza!" I say trying to look tall and strong, even though on the inside, I am terrified. Scared of what the queen could do to me. She has always seemed nice, but underneath, I think-I think she is a monster.

"Alissa, you're coming with me." Eliza walks over, and takes my arm, gently pulling. "Alissa-" the queen says, trying to act caring. I don't want her care. I only want my parents'. But I can't have that care. Trying to accept that, trying, is one of the hardest things I have ever done.

"No!" I say, with as much dissent as I can. Eliza's eyes grow wide, momentarily shocked, then narrow into understanding.

"I see how it is. Alissa, you are much too important to be associating with kitchen hands." Eliza says, putting power into her words, trying to convince me. Only this time, it won't work. She already convinced me to come live in the castle. To stay locked up.

"Well, maybe people aren't as they seem." I shoot back. The queen is having nothing of it.

"Alissa. Come on, it's for your own safety." Eliza says, ice in her voice. Momentarily, this surprises me. Eliza has always been this calm woman, even though deep down, I knew she was like this, I was still unsure about what to expect.

"Fine. I'll come." I said, and with one last longing look at Laura and the outside world, I walked away with the queen.