The Grave Mistakes of Emerson Darcy

It’s hard to say where it started, where all of it started. Maybe it was the summer we spent together after the sixth grade or maybe it was the day we met, maybe it was when Campbell died or when Kate did. All I know is that I can’t put my finger on the exact moment it happened. It might have always been there, this terrible divine force pulling us together from the very beginning of our lives. It’s love, I guess. Not the kind that high school girl’s dream of. The kind that you don’t recover from, the kind that isn’t pleasant. It’s devastating.

                Senior year. I had three days before it started. My heart ached knowing that I wouldn’t have Kate with me for it. Not that she had made it to junior year either but this seemed a little more monumental for her to be absent from. I shook my head, clearing the thought from my brain.

 I sat up in the unfamiliar bed. I looked to my left to see a still snoozing frat boy.  I slid out of the bed. I quickly put my clothes on and left the building.

I took my phone out, my thumbs dancing over the keyboard as I realized I had no one I could call at six in the morning during the summer. I paused. The silence in my town was beautiful and rare. I began my walk home. At least it started as walk, I just wanted to move faster and faster till I ended up in a full on run. I didn’t stop until I made it home.

I stood outside my house, panting. For a while I stared at it. Studying it to see if I could tell from the street that the house had been abandoned by the very people who envisioned it. My parents had fled the town after Campbell’s funeral. That was four years ago. Mom was off in Europe somewhere trying to find something that would make life seem beautiful to her again. Dad on the other hand was all work, in New York making deals and sales and other incredibly pathetic things. They came home sometimes for big things but never more than a few days.

The good thing that came out of them being away was my grandmother coming to live with me and Brennan. Brennan never really missed our brother, I can’t say I did either but the abandonment of our parents really affected him.  Even after all these years he always called and sent mail and tried his very best to never lose hope when he asked “when are you coming home”.

When I finally walked in to the house I was greeted by the smell of cinnamon, I followed my nose to the kitchen. My grandmother was already up making breakfast, her hair still in rollers and wrapped up in her floral silk robe. I set my bag down on the floor before rushing forward and hugging her from behind. She didn’t even jump, it was like she knew I was there.

“Good morning, dear. How was your night out?” she said before turning around to look at me.

“It was swell, Marmy” I replied.

 “Oh goodness, you look disgusting. Are you covered in sweat?”

“I ran home.” I answered as if that explained everything.

“Ah well, I’ve just finished cinnamon pancakes. Get yourself a few and take these up to your brother.” She handed me a massive plate of pancakes.

“Is he even awake yet?”

“Of course, if he wasn’t up I wouldn’t be making pancakes at this hour!”

I nodded my head, turned to take the pancakes to Brennan.

“I got all of the school supplies, no need to worry about that.”

“Thanks, Marmy. You’re amazing.” I shouted my reply as I was walking up the stairs. I pushed the door to Brennan’s room. It was empty. I continued down the hall to his studio. I opened it to see him hard at work on a piece. Paint coated the floor in crazy patterns, the image on the canvas was enthralling though.  It was a bright eyed strawberry blonde toddler with a huge grin on her face and bird in her[Ma1]  hand. Brennan snapped around just then.

“Pancakes.” He said with hands out stretched.

“It’s beautiful, Bren.” I handed over the plate.

“I’m not finished,” he responded before cramming his mouth with pancakes.

“I’m going to bed. Let me know when it is complete.” I had made it almost all the way to the door when he spoke again.

“A guy came to the house yesterday, looking for you. He said he would just come back again today.”

“Ok” I was all I could think of to say. I didn’t like it when people came to my house, I never had anyone over. It was my sanctuary at least it was now, I refused to let any single person ruin that. Kate had been over quite a few times but we’d been best friends since the first grade when her family moved in right next door.

Kate was beautiful. Actually, she wasn’t at least not physically beautiful, it was her personality that shined out of her. What I mean is she was vivacious in a way that made it seem like she was the most enthralling person in the room. She paid so much attention to every single thing a person did. Kate knew everyone better than they knew themselves. I remember her tossing her blonde hair over her shoulder, smirking back at me. She always told me “If you know what makes a person tick there isn’t anything you can’t get them to do.”

I walked to the other end of the hallway, to my room. I pushed the door open. I slumped down on to my bed. Gazing up at my ceiling tracing the constellations with my eyes.  The black ceiling was embedded with twinkle lights that I had begged my parents for when I was eight. I kicked my shoes off and curled up on my bed.

 [Ma1]