Dear Diary...

First chapter

Well I decided to write this because I didn't had anyone else to talk to. These days it's normal to have some kind of journal where you write everything that happens to you, so I thought, "Why not?".
To start my name is Ariel (like the princess Ariel-my mom is a disney lover I gess) and I'm 16 years. People say that is in this age that you try to find yourself, you try to fit in, so you do everytinhg just to be like everyone else (you put on high heels, or some tiny dresses, or lots of makeup) and I think I'm not an exeption. I'm a slim girl (always been) and when I was younger people used to make fun of me, so I tried not to care about it, but the truth was that, that broke me and when I get to high school was like a fresh start so I decided that I was not gonna be weak, so I changed myself (psychologically) just so people din't make fun of me. Looking back that was a terrible mistake and I fully regrett it, and if I knew where it would leed me now I wouldn't have done it.
But I gess I should start for the beginning, because no one does this out of the blue right?
So I was born in Washington DC, but when i was little (probably 1 year) I moved to San Francisco with my parents. My parents, by the way, were totally diferent (I don't even know  how they fell in love), my mom is a calm person, someone that doesn't want much in life, stubborn, and very decided about what she wants, but at the same time very weak to express her opinion. My father, on the contrary is someone that know what he wants, but humble, is not affraid to make himself be heard and very calm but if he gets to his limit he looks like a bomb about to explode. Anyway, in San Francisco we had everything (a big house, a great life, friends, hapiness) until my parents get divorced (not a subject that I like to get into) and then my life changed. I never felt like that was big deal, I mean, I was very young when that happended (but I still remember everything) and that wasn't supposed to afect me, but I don't know if was because of that, that I became who I am today. After that I went back to Washington with my mom and I kept talking and having a great relationship with my dad.
After all these years I look back and I have doubts about all of these . I don't know if you understand but I always felt apart from my family, I gess that I always had envy of others kids, for their (perfect) lifes, for their talents (talents that I never had) or just for the fact that they always knew what they wanted to be. Sometimes I want to be another person (a braver person, a talented person, a happy person), sometimes I wonder what my life would've been if I didn't born in this family, or if I had made different decisions. I gess that everyone gets to point of imagining that, right?