Falling for The Lion

Chapter 11

If you always obsess about what other people think, it takes away a part of you. You become so engrossed in others' point of views that they become your own, and you're just not the same anymore.
That would've been really helpful so many years ago.

I wasn't homophobic. But as for the rest of the world, it has some kinks.
(Not the handcuff kinds).
Over time I slowly became more distant from Phil. I would come out of my room less and less, only to walk to the fridge or, more rarely so, out the door. Phil would knock and propose a trip to the cinema or to a restaurant and I would almost always decline. Eventually he gave up trying to get me to do things with him, and our apartment laid a fragile glass harboring two empty shells who didn't even know each other anymore. I was 23 and he was 28, both mature adults once in love, living in the same space who hardly spoke a word to one another.
A little context:
The comments kept piling up.

"I hate Louise, she gets in between Dan and Phil"
"fags"
"Cat's ruining my OTP!! I can't stand her."

More and more every day. I did what I thought was right; I thought I couldn't love Phil, I thought the world would turn against us, I thought we would be alone, forever. I thought society would be out to get us, if we made our romance known. I thought being anything but straight was taboo. I thought too many things, that let my resentment get too out of control, and caused me and Phil's relationship to spiral too far down a never-ending cavern.

🌸

I woke up in the morning and was tired of just sitting around all day on Tumblr, so I got dressed to go out. As I walked to the living room I noticed Phil wasn't awake yet, so I left a note:
"Going out.
-Dan"
How heartfelt.
Walking around Seven Dials by yourself is never really all that fun by yourself, and it certainly wasn't as fun as it was with the love of my life by my side.
These intrusive thoughts would attack my head every waking moment. Thoughts of Phil.
It was a cold morning in January.
I decided I couldn't have that anymore, I needed to get over it. Fall for someone new. Love someone new.
I could see my breath in the chilly morning air.
And that's when I saw
Her.

A/N: quick (definitely not quick) author's note! Let me just say I'm SO sorry for totally just not writing anymore chapters for TWO YEARS?????????????????? And some people actually read my story and I'm sad to have let them down:( bUT IM GONNA KEEP WRITING CHAPTERS (literally 2 yrs later lmao). Also quick apology for literally all 10 chapters that came before this, I was 12 and they were so cringey and unrealistic ohmygod but I'm gonna try my best to make this good, so I hope some people will read this!:)
A L S O the cover photo for this chapter IS NOT MINE! it was made by lilyum on RedBubble I believe.
Anyways, I really hope you enjoy ! ! ! : )