SCHIZO

Three

It was then when I realized I felt something towards Luke. When him, Ashton, and I were sitting in the corner of the room talking about our problems, I couldn't keep my eyes off of Luke when he spoke. I got it bad.

"Ashley? What schizophrenia like?" Ashton asked quietly.

I look at him and smiled slightly. He was so quiet.

"It's scary," I answered truthfully. It was. "These voices are always talking to you. The things they say are rude and hurtful. Killing."

His eyes widened a bit. "A-are they speaking now?"

"No." I shake my head.

Ashton sat back in his chair, but I stayed forward.

"So, Luke, what's it like being depressed for you?" I ask, desperate to save ourselves from an awkward tension.

Luke is quiet for a moment. He looks at me, then Ashton, then back to me. He sat up, arms crossed.

Luke took a deep breath and looked me dead in the eye. "Hell." He said bluntly. He was quiet for another moment, but continued, still looking me in the eye, "it's glorified. Hell is glorified. It sure shouldn't be. You go on social media sites and you see these people fake cutting for attention and posting depressing things for attention. I-" he pauses, pursing his lips together. "I've cut. I've been through it all, and let me tell you this, Ashley: schizophrenia is a horrible thing. It's probably worse than depression, but with depression you fall slowly. And I'm falling at this very moment, Ashley. I slip farther and farther away with every word I say."

Luke leans back into the chair and looks away. He was done.

I glanced at Ashton. He bit his lip and looked at his hands.

Suddenly, Luke gets up and kicks the small chair back and storms out of the room. Anthony looks up and begins to go after him. I stand up and give a nod to Anthony. He backs up and I leave after Luke.

Once I leave the church, I see Luke standing at the side of the church, arms across his stomach. He doesn't look, but he knows I'm here, because he just says, "I'm sorry." I walk up to him and shake my head.

"I didn't mean to freak out. I don't know. Maybe it was the bipolar in me. I'm really sorry."

"Luke.."

"Stupid Ashley, he isn't really sorry." I could hear the voices coming in. They sounded far away, though. "He just wants to make you think he is"

"He is one of us you know. He's not real. It's a lie, Ashley Dunn, and you're an idiot for not realizing it."

"Ashley Dunn? More like Ashley Dumm."

And that's what happened. The voices conversed. It didn't feel like they were in my head, though. I rapidly turned left, right and around as each voice spoke. They're here.

When I faced Luke, he was looking at me wide-eyes. He parted his lips and walked up to me slowly. I was hysterically crying at this point and rapidly breathing. I shook my head vigorously with each nearing step. I could see he was trying to calm me down, but I couldn't hear it. All I heard was a loud ringing and laughs. My breath quickened and I began to feel a bit light-headed. I think I'm going to pass out. Maybe die. I hope I die.

I did something, because the last thing I remember is Luke's voice screaming my name.

-

I've been sitting in the dark for what feels like years. It's just been me. Alone. I must be inside my mind, because nothing has passed through. No memories, no imaginary friends, not even any voices. I'm just totally and utterly alone. I'm the same in the real world as I am in my mind.

I looked to my left and I see a light. I don't know if I should be running towards it or not. Is it heaven? Am I dying? The black floor I was sitting on begins to move towards the light. I don't fight it. Suddenly, I can hear something. A constant beeping.

The next thing I know I'm awake and gasping for air. I'm in a hospital bed connected to wires.

I look next to me and I see Luke Hemmings waking up from the chair he was sitting in.

"Ashley?" He groans, opening his eyes. I don't reply. He was surrounded by flowers and balloons.

"Ashley! You're awake!" He smiles, finally laying his now open eyes on me.

I blink two times before asking, "What are these?"

He sits up straight and looks at the flowers and balloons.

"Oh, they're flowers and balloons," he giggles. Although I was amused, I must not have looked like it, because he followed by saying, "some of these are from family and friends. There's one from Anthony. I think some are from Calum, Ashton and some Michael kid." He looks at me, eyes wide, "who's Michael? Is he..is he your boyfriend?"

I'm assuming he means Michael Clifford, because I don't know any other Michael.

"No. He's a guy I've been going to group therapy with since the beginning."

He sighs in relief, I think. There looks like more than four flowers, presents, balloons and cards. I look at Luke with a questioning look, "and the others?"

Luke's bright blue eyes look to his hands. "Me. Everyday since you've been out I've gone to buy you a balloon, flowers, a present, and a card. That's the only time I've left this room," he pauses and smiles, "well, that and to go to the bathroom."

I part my lips in awe. He did that? For me? Mom didn't even do that.

"H-how long have I been out?"

"A little more than a week. You had a pretty bad panic attack."

There was a silence. Not a bad one, just neither of us spoke. We both had the same thing on our mind.

I felt Luke's fingers snake between mine. I looked down at him. His big blue eyes were wide, and he looked me dead in the eye when he asked, "what do they say?"

I pause for a moment. What do they say? I'm an idiot, fat, worthless, psycho, freak, weirdo, slut, bitch, whore..

"The truth." I whisper.

"No offense, Ashley, but I don't think voices telling you that you're beautiful and smart is such a bad thing." Luke says, trailing off at the end.

He thinks I'm beautiful?

"You think I'm beautiful?" I ask.

He nods, "of course I do, Ashley."

I felt my cheeks getting hot and I fought back a smile forming on my lips. Nobody's ever thought I was beautiful before. Except my family, of course.

Luke began tracing circles on the back of my hand. The touch of his fingers sent chills up and down my body. He was only touching my hand.

"You know, Ashley," he begins, "I can't guarantee much. Life...I don't know what's going to happen in life, I can't guarantee I'll be here until I'm eighty, I can't guarantee a meteor will never hit the Earth as long as I'm alive, and I can't guarantee things will get better right away, for you, I, and everyone else. But I can guarantee one thing: you are beautiful, Ashley Marie Dunn. You are beautiful, and I will spend the rest of my natural life helping you see that you truly are"

-

The third part! I hope you guys like it. From here on out the story should start picking up and progressively getting better, so stay tuned!! :)