Relatable Posts

#122

Drunk stories found on the web.

Me and my friends had a party. I kinda drank too much and I went outside and barked on every human who passed. I even fitted in their neighbor’s kennel.

One time I got so drunk at house party, my friends told me that I gave lap dance to passed out dude, called my mom and told her I want to marry her, then peed in someone’s closet and ran away. They found me after hour upstairs eating fruit loops on the washing machine.

One time I was dared to drink half a bottle of vodka and 12 jager bombs, so I did. I ended up hugging a guy dressed in a clown costume, than got scared and ran into my room where I threw up on my bed. I woke up the next morning and my bed was in the shower filled with water. turns out i tried to clean the vomit stain.

One night I couldn’t find the toilet and I was so drunk that I attempted to piss off the balcony of our 11th story apartment. When my friend restrained me and said that it wasn’t a good idea I escaped and ran down the hallway and peed outside the lift. Pretty sure I left a stain.

One time I was in a country in south america. In a small town had a few bars. Started drinking. Eventually I remember we started playing that stupid party like a rockstar song. Meanwhile the locals are just looking at these nutcases, us. At some point we found a homeless dude, bought him a beer. We named him taco. He told us he killed someone once. Interesting night.

I got so drunk tonight that I just woke up in a freezing cold shower with a broken glass of whiskey and a wet plate of fried chicken.

I was so drunk at a party in Argentina that after taking a shot I drank unsafe tap water. People had to help me throw it up only to find me drinking more water 5 minutes later… This time out of a plant vase.

Do not mess with Frank Kozumplik when he runs out of wine. Determined to keep the party going during a storm in 2008, the Adrian, Mich. man mounted a John Deer tractor and rode down the center of his street to get to the liquor store. When police arrested him and confiscated his mower, they revealed that his blood alcohol level was 2.5 times higher than Michigan’s legal driving limit.