Slick Devolpment

Chapter Four

When I walked to the bus stop, Hex was there. He wasn't on his Ipod and his head was low. He sat, leaned against the stop sign and let his slim black hair cover his eyes. I slowly walked up to him. Was he mad? "Hex...?" I approuched him quietly and sat next to him. He glanced at me and sat up. "Hey." He huffed. "Why are you mad?" I asked, letting my backpack fall off my shoulders. I couldn't see his face to read his emotion, I couldn't even tell if he wasn't even paying attention. After a moment, he replied quietly. "I'm not mad. Just confused." 

"Confused, about..." I couldn't ask what. I'm pretty sure I know why. But what, exactly? "Confused about the fight yesterday? Why?" I stared up at him. There was a long moment, like he was thinking and reviewing over his words. "Confused about us." He turned his head and flipped the hair out of his face. His cheeks where red, from tears or from blushing? ...both?

"What do you mean?" I asked. "I thought you liked me." He turned away like he was rejected. My heart started pounding faster. So, he was, jealous yesterday? I stared at him for a moment. I reliaze... maybe, I... I do like him back. "Hex, I like you to." I said, my voice almost a whisper. It felt weird, saying that since I never really told a guy that. Let alone having a boyfriend. "Then why where you kissing Graze? Lyric?" he shuttered, hurt. I felt guilty. The expresstion on his face... it was, so real. 

"He kissed me first, I... I don't know why I let him. My whole body just kinda went stiff, It was my first kiss... to be honest," I explained carefully. He looked at me with confused eyes. "I think I just needed affection, this entire moving thing has been hard, and other stuff are happening at home." I glanced away. Don't get personal, I told myself. I looked at him and our eyes met. "Look, Lyric. I'm not going to hold a grudge. It just, really... confused me though. Your kiss with my friend." He said the last word quietly. I felt my heart cringe for a second. I wanted to do something, daring, risky. I leaned in to kiss him, but he turned his head away slowly. I stopped and pulled my head back, regret pulsing in me. "Give it time." He whispered so softly, I barely heard him.

The bus pulled up and he sat in the very back. I wanted him so badly... I wanted that playfully crushing feeling he gave me when he sat next to me, I want him to grab my shoulders, to tease me and have fun. Now, I'll I can think about is, did I brake the Slick Devolpment leader?

At school, I sat at a different table. I didn't see Hex sitting with his friends. I saw Jade and Amy looking around. There my friends, but its just not... fun or comfortable without Hex. Where they looking around for me? Or Hex? Or both? Graze sat with them, he kept shaking his head. Was the gang asking him questions? Would he give in and tell them how bad I shoke Hex? No... because he was the one to cause it. Would he leave Slick Devolpment? I held my head, wishing that kiss never even happened.

When I walked home, Hex caught my eye. I didn't want this to go on anymore. I raced over to him. "Hex! Please... don't feel, what your feeling." I looked at him seriously, knowing he's not mad. He smiled a little bit. "Can't read my emotion?" He asked quietly, sligtly grinning. I smiled. "No, your like a white wall." I said playfully. "Sometimes I feel like one." He remarked, still walking. I walked a little faster to keep up with his pace.  Whats that mean? That sometimes he feels, emotionless? I glanced at him and kept the pace.  "Me to. I guess." I sighed quietly.

"I'm not, mad or sad or whatever anymore, Lyric." Hex said as we stopped at the drive-way of his house. "I thought about what you told me, and I understand. Me and Hex talked 7th period, where cool now. He's just sad... that you, didn't want the kiss." Hex looked hurt for his friend, his own pain gone. Guilt pricked my stomach. It wasn't my fault, Graze kissed me. "Hey well... Iv'e been confused to. But um," I wanted to talk but I didn't know really what to say. I trailed off and stared at my feet. "Confused about.. what." Hex promped quietly. I just shook my head. "Whens tomorrows, band meeting?" I asked, changing the subject. "4." He said plannly, knowing I was going to ask something different. He waved and started walking to his house. I waved back and let my hand drop at my side. Dissapointment made my stomach fell heavy and my head ache.

When I walked inside, I couldn't hear my mom, or Nicky. I walked upstairs quickly and flung myself on my bed. I turned on the TV, to quiet and I plugged my Ipod earbuds in. I needed noise, to calm down. I hated silence when Im sad. 

I remembered Tris. And how she was changing girly and snobby. I sighed knowing she wouldn't really be on to deal with my problems. Or if she would even care. Shes probably making vines with her new boyfriend. I stared out my window and watched as cars passed by. The tree branches shuttered calmly and few leaves fell, it seemed kinda peaceful. I closed my eyes and breathed in, tensing.