Jealous? (Dan Howell/Phil Lester x reader)

2: There Once Was a Boy Named Philip

your pov

Phil very clearly moved towards me now. My mind was racing, telling me to definitely not stop walking because it would look a lot more weird than simply going with the flow and pretending like it had been my intention to come up to him al along. No use in trying to avoid this. it would only make it more awkward.

You're a calm and collected adult, Y/N. That's what I kept telling myself. Whatever would come next, I'd be chill and casual about it. My head kept talking to itself. We're both just twenty-something normal humans with a shared taste in music and he happens to make things which coincidentally a lot of people happen to appreciate, it doesn't mean anything, talk to him like he's a person. I mean, what do I mean LIKE he's a person? He IS a person. Fucking...

No more time to think. Phil was at an arm's length. I smiled politely, held out my hand, ready to introduce myself, but instead he reached beyond my extended arm around my shoulder, and pulled me in for a hug. Just. Great. He must be under the assumption I'm just some giddy fangirl. My mind fought with itself over I AM a giddy fangirl   and   I'm your bloody equal, don't treat me like an obsessed little twat.  I decided to go with the voice of confidence. I was someone. I'd done things. I'd made things. I was smart and nice and maybe I hadn't, by some combination of hard work and chance, created a dedicated following of millions, but it was about time I stopped assuming the latter was a requirement to be interesting and respectable.

I took control of this situation like a boss. I made this hug into an old pals type of deal. A happy hey-how've-you-been greeting rather than a clingy, dragged out OH-MY-GOD-I-CAN'T-BELIEVE-IT smothering. In doing so, I got over myself. Sure, this was Phil Lester. What an occasion, nice opportunity, but as it stood I was on my way to get drinks and I'd been interrupted in doing so.

"Hi, nice to meet you! Sorry, I did recognise you but I was actually on my way to get a drink if you don't mind. Can I get you anything?" Smooth. 
My words were accompanied by a radiant, confident smile. They poured from my lips flawlessly. My legs felt weak but I maintained my composure. Fake it till you make it, Y/N.

Phil seemed caught by surprise and I just managed to acknowledge his slightly stuttered "Ehm, sure, a beer is fine." before I darted off to the bar to get me some delicious cocktail goodness. Nailed it. I'd been casual about it, showed that I wasn't some insecure teenager that was gonna drop everything to worship at his feet, and had at the same time seemlessly established that I'd be coming back for a chat on my  time. My insides had a little party, my stomach high-fived my colon. I had never felt this on top.

Phil's pov

That was weird. I'd been so sure I'd seen that girl looking at me before so I just assumed that when she came in my direction, it was to come talk to me. Thought I recognised her, too. It's not every day you have very active followers on Twitter with their own face for a profile picture. Maybe it was her? She did say she recognised me. Stupid, stupid, stupid. That's what you get for trying to be nice to fans because you think they're feeling awkward and you want to make approaching you a little easier because they're probably nervous. Way to assume, Philip. I just made it more awkward. She must think I'm a freak now. Good thing Dan had just wandered off to take a leak too. Imagine how cringy that would have been. She was going to come back. Oh my god. What should I say. AH! Why was I freaking out so much over this! No! Stop your thoughts! You're not making it better! She was just a person. She obviously knew who I was. She was probably aware of what I was like. Alright, stay calm. Maybe she thought it was endearing and very "me"? 

I swallowed as I saw her coming back towards me, drinks in hand. My mouth was dry. These accidental encounters had never come easy to me, but there were some occasions that were a rare kind of anxiety inducing, often through my own lack of social skills, and this was definitely one of those.