Mad Hatter //Tokyo Ghoul//

[28] s u i c i d e

I have already decided my decision.

"Mon petit chou, there you are!" Tsukiyma-kun approached me, "How do you---uh." 
"I presume the conversation with Toshi did not go well?" Kaneki-kun articulated, getting up from the chair he was sitting on.
"It delightfully didn't," I replied, well aware of the deadly aura I was giving off, "He needs to understand that there are some things that will never be the same." 
"Perhaps it might take a while to comprehend his feelings?" Kaneki-kun suggested, "I know this is none of my business." 
"It's fine," I shrugged, "Anyways, forget about this. It's not important."
"What are you both even talking about?" Tsukiyama-kun tilted his head.

I shook my head as if to say, 'forget it.' I looked at Kaneki-kun again, pursing my lips before opening my mouth to talk. 

Just say it. You have no one else to rely on if you refuse his request.

"Kaneki-kun," I took a deep breath, "I accept your request that you had mentioned earlier." 
"Really?" He widened his eyes.
"Yes," I nodded, "I'll join your group." 
"Thank you, Yami-chan." His lips tugged into a small smile.
"You're joining us?" Tsukiyama-kun gasped.

I nodded.

"C'est fantastique mon petit chou!" He exclaimed, wrapping his arm around my shoulder, "Je vais sûrement vous protéger!"
"Merci, j'apprécie." I managed to pull a smile. 
"Uh..?" Kaneki-kun tilted his head. His expression said, 'I don't understand French, you know?' 
"I apologize," I chuckled softly, "I tend to get carried away." 
"It's alright," Kaneki-kun smiled, "Anyways, w--"
"Hatter-san?" A voice squeaked.

I turned my head towards the person who spoke. It was Hinami-chan.

"Hinami-chan, hey." I gave a friendly wave, as my expression softened.
"Are you feeling alright now?" She asked, giving a sweet, innocent smile.
"Yeah," I ruffled her hair, "Thanks, you know? I would have been dead if you didn't spot me in that situation." 
"E-eh?" She blushed slightly, "It was nothing!! I'm just glad you're okay now!" 

A smile played on my lips, but it soon faded when I felt my stomach churn. 

"Hatter-san?" Hinami-chan called out to me, staring at me with her wide brown eyes.

A high pitched scream came from the room I was previously in. Speaking of that room, Toshi hasn't come out of it either.

It is not mistaken that the scream is Toshi's. What had he done?

"Toshi.." Kaneki-kun mumbled, widening his eyes, "Quick! We need to check what's wrong!"

I was the first to barge in the room, with others behind me. I knew that this has something to do with the disorder he had. 

But I thought it was cured ages ago?

"Toshi.." I mumbled, widening my eyes, "What the hell?"

He had his face buried in his hands as his kagune was set loose. He wasn't in his state of mind. 

"TOSHI!!" I yelled.

He flinched as he heard my name. He looked up, as his pupils narrowed and his frown turned into a twisted smile.  

Who would have thought he would snap in one minute?

"TOSHI!! SNAP OUT OF IT!" I screamed. This was bad. Real bad, I tell you. When he's in such a state, he--

"Yami, Yami, Yami! I would break all your bones at once, but you're too delicate and fragile!" He cackled, "Ah! I hate you so much, but I love you too! If only you knew from the beginning! Then maybe I could have prevented you from getting too close with other males!" 

He faked a sad sniffle.

"What's with him?" Kaneki-kun muttered, looking at me in the eye.
"Depersonalization disorder," I whispered, "I thought it was gone..ages ago.." 

"Yami! You know, I'm so hurt that you slapped me!" He wiped a fake tear from his eyes, "You shall be punished! After all, I was just confessing my love to you!" 
"You need to go," Tsukiyama-kun turned towards me, "Go, now." 
"She's not going anywhere!" 

I felt a scaly tentacle wrapped around my body, preventing me from moving. I was then lifted up in the air.

"You put her down this second, Toshi," Tsukiyama-kun growled, "You have five seconds."
"Toshi, put her down!" Kaneki-kun yelled, activating his kagune. 
"Mhm," Toshi smirked, "Five seconds is enough to do this."

He slammed my body to the wall back and forth. I tried to escape from his grasp. But no matter how much I tried, he would squeeze me even more; causing my bones to clash with each other. My whole body was limp, and I coughed out blood. 

"Enough!" Tsukiyama-kun hissed, activating his kagune before charging towards Toshi.
"Tsukiyama-kun, please don't." I whispered weakly.
"Well, Gourmet," Toshi smirked again, "If you want to see your darling die in my grasp, then sure. If you don't want to, then stop where you are." 
"Toshi," I whimpered, trying to activate my own kagune but failing, "Please, stop." 
"You sick bastard." Tsukiyama-kun spat, stopping in his tracks. 
"What the hell do you want, Toshi?" Kaneki-kun yelled in anger, standing in front of Hinami-chan.
"What I want?" Toshi cackled, "I just want her! That's all! This is just a punishment game!" 
"Toshi-san!! Please stop!!" Hinami-chan pleaded, slightly trembling. 
"Toshi..y-you.." I muttered, looking down as my bangs covered my eyes.
"What is it, dear?" He cooed. 

I sank my canine teeth into the scaly tentacle and chewed off a chunk of it. It was disgusting, especially from a ghoul like him. 

He yelped and loosen his grip on me. I instantly fell on my knees.

"Y-you!!" He hissed in pain.

I rose to my feet and Tsukiyama-kun rushed towards me. I raised my hand, signalling him to stop. He had a confused expression plastered on his face as I then placed my hand near my chest. 

"I always.." I whispered, "Hated myself, hated wars, hated everything in this cruel world.." 

What am I doing?

"Everything that had happened..is all because of me," I looked down, smiling, "And I don't think I'll regret what I plan to do now."
"Yami!" Toshi gritted his teeth, "I'll kill all your--"
"If you do," I looked up, smiling while my whole body was numb, "I'll kill your most prized possession!" 
"Don't you dare!" He growled.
"Prized possession..?" Kaneki-kun mumbled.
"Me." I turned towards him. 

I took a deep breath. Is this what they call the end? 

"Yami, I'll never forgive you." Tsukiyama-kun growled.
"H-hatter-san?" Hinami-chan whispered in fear at the scene that was unfolding before her. 
"I'm sorry," I smiled, as tears rolled down my cheeks, "Everyone..thank you for everything that you've done."

Dammit. Why am I crying?

Everyone froze with their mouths ajar.

"This is goodbye." 

I plunged my fist into my chest.

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TRANSLATIONS (I could be wrong) :
-C'est fantastique mon petit chou! (That's fantastic, my dear!)
-Je vais sûrement vous protéger! (I will surely protect you!)
-Merci, j'apprécie. (Thank you, I appreciate it.)

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(A/N) I know, I know, too many twists in here. From Toshi going nuts because of a disorder to Mad Hatter committing suicide to end the battle. 
But do not fear! This is not the end of the book yet! You will also see how the suicide impacted Toshi in the next chapter.
By the way, my readers, do you want a second book after this one ends? 

P.s: Who did you guys ship Mad Hatter with? (If you did shipped her with someone, that is!)