Stagger

Thursday 6th

I feel nothing but hatred towards you." The words that put me down for a long time said by the person I was sure I loved.
See we didn't always see eye to eye so we fought occasionally but we'd always manage to make it work between us making me think it was all worth it in the end. That was until I found her, the person who helped me define love...

Thursday 6th

I'm not too popular at school but I do have a small group which live pretty far away from me so I'd always walk to school with my headphones in letting the day go by, the neighbourhood bullies were up ahead and I was about to cross the road to avoid confrontation till I saw her.

A short girl with long brown hair being harassed, I met her eyes as she pulled away from the bullies and my heart sank. "Leave her alone!" I shouted, the guys turned and laughed at my attempt.
Of course this wasn't smart of me... what'd I expect? They outnumbered me three to one.

Last thing I remember of that encounter before I hit the floor was a fist heading towards my face. The pain I felt as my eye throbbed, I was dazed but she stood over me with a smile on her face.
"A~ are you okay miss?" What was I thinking? Miss? We are probably the same age... I'm such a dork.
"I'm fine, how about you" she replied with a soft giggle as she covered her smile.

I laughed as I picked myself up from the floor, our eyes met again followed by the same sinking feeling. From the look of her uniform we attend the same school but I don't think I've seen her around? "Are you a new transfer?" Her smile dropped as I asked that "No! We've been in the same classes for two years now Jake!"

"U~ ugh..." I'm an idiot, I had no words to say in order to make it up with her, I always sat in the back corner of the room where nobody could bother me drawing in my sketchbook, my grades were good although I don't revise so I'm not very alert or enthusiastic during classes.
She sighed "We're going to be late, let's get going" she said it with a smile that warmed me? I don't know how to explain it apart from contagious? It was a smile that made me smile.

As we walked I learned more about her, her name is Grace and we actually live really close to each other, she knows I'm an unsociable shutin outside of school but has no clue why.
Not a lot of people do know why I'm unsociable, I've had bad history with being abandoned by people who made me trust them and I guess I haven't gotten over that?

My friends were standing at the gates waiting for me, their stares dug into my skin as Grace and I walked. "You don't have to walk me inside you know? I'd hate to embarrass you" she said calmly. This put me in another heroic situation, do I walk her in and escort her to her friends or do I leave her to walk herself... I've tried being a hero once today I guess.
"Okay, I'll see you in class then" idiot! Idiot! Idiot! Walk her to class! You can see your friends anytime!

It was too late, she had already walked away and my group started hammering me with questions. They seemed to know her unlike I, turns out she's a popular girl who's adored by all the guys in my class.
"Enough with the questions, we just walked to school okay?" I honestly wish that were enough to calm them; they were like savage animals thirsty for information and ready to kill me to get it.

The bell rang so I walked in and took my seat, instead of sinking into my own world as usual I actually looked around to see where she sat.
The students sat in two columns of 5 by 3, my self assigned seat was L5,1 or left column, 5th seat up, 1st seat in closest to the wall and hers... I'm an idiot... L4,2... am I really that oblivious?

My head hit the desk in embarrassment of my own ignorance, I heard her giggle so I know she turned around to see me suffering.
Two lessons worth of doodling down and now it's lunch time, the teacher excused us but she didn't stand? "Is something up with you Grace?" Nailed that empathetic question!

"Your heroic act didn't save my lunch money from being taken..." I couldn't help but laugh and I thought I shouldn't have but she ended up joining me in laughter.
"I'll lend you money for today, pay me back tomorrow K?"

I walked her to the cafeteria and we waited in line together talking but I could've feel the stares again, this time they were more intense like every guy in school had it out for me.
She got her food and left for her group with a smile and a wave, the stares began to ease but her smile warmed me again...

She asked the teacher to leave last lesson early to go see the school nurse, did the guys actually hurt her? Possibilities flood my mind and my fist filled with anger, I hate them! I'll make them regret this morning!
The final bell rang so I grabbed my bag and left the room, unlike everyone else I didn't attend extra curricular after school so I headed for the gates.

Hidden behind the wall was Grace holding an ice pack, "I thought you could use this for your eye" she said with the same giggle. "Is that why you left early! Moron!" Why was I even mad? She helped me... "I'm sorry, it was my fault you got hurt so I thought I'd make it up to you".
I sighed and grabbed the ice pack, I was really happy but for some reason I just couldn't bring it out to tell her... "let's just head home" I said, the walk home was in complete silence and I felt so bad but I couldn't say anything because of the guilt I was feeling.