California (Septiplier)

Chapter 6 - Shower Thoughts

"I let my thoughts take over as I sat under the hot water. The more I thought about how I shouldn't love him, the more I did, but I just can't."

~°○°~

After they had ate breakfast, Mark decided he needed a shower, "Hey, you can sit and watch tv or play games or something, but I gotta shower, if you don't mind."

     "Oh, okay, that's totally cool," Jack smiled and flipped through channels on the tv.

~•●•~

      Mark showered in silence. Normally he would have music, but he wanted to think. Silence is always better for thinking. Always.

      'Fuck! Why am I feeling like this? I haven't felt stupid feelings like this since high school...'

      'My heart shouldn't flutter when he smiles or laughs...'

      'No, it does it when he walks into the room... my heart flip turns upside down when he smiles and laughs.'

      'Fuck me, man...'

       Mark began to hold his head in his hands, not understanding why he felt the way he did.

       'Boys can't like boys. That's not how the world works... Right? I've always seen it in books and movies, but in person? Things like that just don't work out.'

      'They just can't.'

      Mark was drowning in his thoughts as a light knock sounded on the bathroom door.

      "Come in!" Mark yelled, hoping he was heard.

      The door creaked open slowly and Jack began to quietly speak, "You all Good? You've been in here for a while."

      The American let out a chuckle, "Yeah, I'm fine. Just thinking and stuff."

      "I understand that," the Irishman chuckled as well, "I'll be leavin you alone now."

      "Alright, I'll be out in a bit!"

      Mark couldn't help but finding himself smiling at the thought of Jack worrying about him, 'He's too cute. I can't believe he was actually starting to worry about me.'

       'Fuck, I really gotta stop thinking that type of stuff.'

      The redhead turned off the water and let out a sigh.

      'I don't love him.'

      He dried off and pulled on his clothes, then turned towards the mirror, looking himself in the eyes.

      'I can't love him!'

      He let out another sigh as he opened the door and walked into the living room, seeing that Jack was sleeping once again.

      'Damnit, he's really fucking cute! I can't love him, I can't love him! I can't! I just can't!'

      Mark sighed angerly and turned off the tv.

      "Is everything okay, Mark,' a sweet Irish accent filled the American's ears as his back was turned.

       "Uh, yeah, I'm all good," he said, turning around and smiling towards the other sleepy man.

       "Alright, well," Jack began as he stood up and stretched, "I think I'm gonna head in the shower too, if that's alright?"

      "Of course."

~•●•~

      'Jack! You have to stop it with all the worrying!' The Irishman sighed to himself as he turned on the water.

      "Fuck!" He muttered and jumped back at the coldness of the water. He eased himself under it as it got warmer.

      'If I keep worrying he'll find out... I can't let him know how I feel.'

       'I... I just can't.'

       Jack looked down at his feet, watching as the hot water trickled down his body and made it red.

      'After all, he doesn't feel the same. He's obviously straight and it'd be stupid of me to fall for him.'

      'But, sadly... I already have.'

      He cursed at himself as he continued to think about all the reasons he shouldn't love Mark, but he knew he couldn't just stop loving him.

      After all, who could?

      Mark was literally perfect in Jack's eyes. He was handsome in every way, starting with his stunning red hair to his toned muscles to the way his clothes hugged him just right. And his eyes, oh his eyes. The silly Irishman could get forever lost in their beauty. They reminded him of chocolate, dark chocolate, which always helped with his mood.

      'Fuck! Why do I have to be in love?'

      Poor Jack hated it when he feel in love. He always fell too soon and no one was ever able to catch him. He'd fall too hard and lose it all because no one ever truly loved him back. His love life always had been very bad, though he never understood why. He was always used and abused in some way, and he hated it. He hated the thought of love because he was afraid.

      'I just can't afford to have my heart shatter again because it won't be able to be glued back together again...' Jack sighed as he turned off the water and got dressed.

      Looking into the mirror, he looked up at himself, worry and doubt filling his eyes, 'I just can't risk it.'

       He opened the door to see that Mark was standing outside it, his hand up as if he were about to knock.

       "I... uh... I'm sorry, you've been in there for about an hour and I began to... worry," Mark sighed, avoiding eye contact as his face grew red.

      The Irishman giggled in response, "It's okay!"

      They both sort of just stood there, staring at each other as the silence became more and more awkward.

      "Mark?" Jack chuckled.

       "Hm?" He replied, not paying much attention, as he was too lost in the other's eyes.

      "I can't leave the bathroom till you move..."

       "Oh, uh..." Mark blushed and quickly moved out of the way. "S-sorry."

      Jack could only let out a quiet laugh in response as his thoughts confirmed his fear. 'I've really fallen in love...'

~°○°~

A/N:

      I almost left out Jack's part entirely. I was simply gonna cut it off at Mark's, but I kinda like the silly Irishman's part too much (or at least the end of it).